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Help to change and adapt.

Why can't we as women Help change the child support laws instead of helping to keep them the way they are? They are wrong! It is set up for women to just collect a paycheck basically. You all need to stop! (maybe not everyone)
I get CS but my child's father lives in a different state and voluntary left. But what about all those great dads out there that live by their kids and want to be around. The one's who want their kids as much as possible but the women won't let them just so they can have some sort of control and collect their paychecks.
These dad's out there want to be able to buy their kids things and take them places too. But they can't because they have to give all their money to you so you can be the parent and the dad's can just be visitors. How sad.
What if he looses his job or is going through a ruff time, the cs just keeps adding up, it's doesn't stop. That is not real life, the mother won't go to jail for not making enough money for her kids, no one will know and no one cares it's only dads that suffer.
I understand if you want your ex to suffer I get it but it is hurting all those other good dad's out their not just your ex.
The women that really need help,the one's who deserve full custody should get it but there are a lot of details in the CS laws that need to be changed and it will be changing. California is already trying but it needs a lot more people out there to help and it needs to happen sooner than later.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 7:38 PM on Nov. 27, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (4)
  • I'll say the same thing that I posted when this was asked before: He makes the kid, he supports the kid. End of story. If I lose my job I don't stop paying to support my child, and the father does not get that luxury either.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:53 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • Here are two stories for you:

    You have a father that voluntarily pays CS, but STILL doesn't get to see his child all the time or even sometimes during his visitation assigned days. Situations like this suck because the father WANTS to be more for the child, but the mother wants to use the kid as a pawn because she's bitter and pissed..

    Then you have a mother who has two kids, and the father wanted to leave... never paid for anything for the kids and doesn't bother holding a job half the time because it interferes with his soft ball schedule during the summers. She works two jobs, to support her kids, and STILL lets him see his kids when he wants to because regardless of what she thinks of him, they are still his kids and it's his rights. She get's about nil for child support because half the time he doesn't work.


    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 8:32 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • my point:

    the mom that deserves the money, still get's screwed, and the father that wants more and still pays voluntarily still gets screwed. So it's not just fathers that get screwed, they can screw the mothers too. And there is nothing that really can be done to the other parent that screws the parent trying to do what is right.

    and yes those are true stories. My brother is the first person, and I am the second person.

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 8:35 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • as for the father loosing his job.. they just have to refile their job change and pay scale. But then again every state is different on their laws.
    Here, all the father has to do is file poverty if they loose their job or aren't working and it's $25 a month.. barely a package of diapers and wipes.

    It's not always about wanting to hurt the father, it's about being realistic. The father made the kid(s) too. and should pay for part of their upbringing. I agree that the pay should be done in more of a foodstamp like format or something.. (where there is a check in part for food, then part toward clothes, etc in a card format so it could be monitored) but really that's unrealistic to try to monitor. There are ways however that if recipes are saved they can sometimes be discounted off CS payments if you discuss such a set up with the judge.

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 8:42 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

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