Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

really now, which is better ?

To disagree with my childrens father and to have to set up a schedule just for us to share our kids and split holidays...

OR

To have a great friendship to where we can co-parent everyday... but put a damper on personal relationship with others ( basicaly making it hard to date because the people we date might get jealous )


I think the answer is obvious.... but I am wondering why I am getting so much grief for it !!!

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:53 PM on Nov. 27, 2010 in Parenting Debate

Answers (16)
  • Friendship and coparenting for the best interest of the child. That does NOT mean it will affect relationships, it just means you get along because it is what is best for the children.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 11:55 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • I know... I have a wonderful relationship with my ex husband ( kids father ) ... we are best friends but have absolutly no romantic feelings...... but yet it is "my fault" if he has a girlfriend that doesnt like our arrangment

    * this is basically a rant *
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:05 AM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • tell him to deal with it. you have a great thing going with the kids. if the new person has a problem it is the other's job to explain why what the feelings are towards eachother. in other words: YOU ARE NOT THE BAD GUY!!! you need to talk to the ex and explain how you feel. i'm praying for the best for all of you.
    noel1978

    Answer by noel1978 at 12:12 AM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • thanks, but it isnt him - he is happy with our arrangment.... it is others ( in person and on here when I asked a question about it )
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:15 AM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • You need to keep a good relationship with the kids' father. This will not affect any relationship worth keeping. My cousin and her ex lived in the same apt building to be near the kids and they both have awesome relationships with other people. In fact, he is getting remarried soon. Anyone mature and worth having won't mind that you are on good terms with your ex. You have children. There is no room pettiness now.
    CarriePM

    Answer by CarriePM at 12:56 AM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • In other words, ignore the bish. She will eventually make herself look like a big baby and that relationship will fizzle.
    CarriePM

    Answer by CarriePM at 12:57 AM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • Do you still love the dad? The friendship is healthy and good for family.
    trashymom

    Answer by trashymom at 4:44 AM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • sucking it up for the sake of the kids wouldn't be a new idea and maybe you can try and get along with the guy long enough for those little excersions.
    Zoeyis

    Answer by Zoeyis at 7:34 AM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • What do you mean by "co-parent everyday" what does the parenting schedule look like?
    BubbaLuva

    Answer by BubbaLuva at 9:11 AM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • I have a fantastic relationship with my ex . We co parent well together and i still care for him deeply....however , i absolutely had to put my foot down about being " Allowed" to move on with my life. He was using our child and our co-parenting relationship as a way to strong arm or scare away any man who would come with in a fifty foot radius of my home. I moved on...and we still get along great, we still co parent wonderfully, we still chat and occasionally take our daughter places together. He needed clearly defined limits , and when it comes to me and my life he no longer has control over any of it. He is in it for our child, a friendship between us is just a bonus and makes life a lot less stressful.

    sulkygirl79

    Answer by sulkygirl79 at 10:56 AM on Nov. 28, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.