Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

can anyone explain to me why it is that so many people get pregnant by accident while many completely normal fertile people cannot seem to conceive even when actively trying to? adult content

I keep hearing stories about people getting pregnant from pre-ejaculate, while on their period, while using the withdrawal method, condom breaking, rhythm method...all these accidents...

Then why on Earth is it at the same time that all of these accidents are happening..perfectly healthy and fertile couples are actively trying to get pregnant and even using ovulation tests and cannot??

Someone please tell me why this happens?

I might be pregnant from one little incident but my cousin and his wife actively tried to get pregnant for over a year and even went to a fertility expert who said they were both fine and finally they did...i just don't get it.

I feel like I'm being punished and it sucks because I'd much rather these sweet little blessings go to those who are trying and not people like me who have 2 kids already and feel plenty blessed enough.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:47 PM on Nov. 28, 2010 in Pregnancy

Answers (9)
  • I have wondered this before. It is unfair for people who have been trying for years to get pregnant and can't but yet teenagers get knocked up and have abortions. I know I was not trying to get pregnant with my two.
    ashisamom

    Answer by ashisamom at 12:49 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • Maybe those who are trying are trying too hard? Maybe the stress somehow affects the sperm production or something... I don't know, but it does seem to happen the way you said!

    IhartU

    Answer by IhartU at 12:52 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • I know, it seems really unfair. Some of the couples who are TTC for years would be just the BEST parents, and then some people who never wanted kids (NOT saying this is you!!) end up with 5, and then treat them horribly. It's such an imbalance in the world, and really sad. The world works in mysterious ways.
    musicpisces

    Answer by musicpisces at 12:52 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • I personally think that 50% of the people that said they were on BC when they got preg are full of boloney. So that narrows it down a little. I also know many, including myself that stopped BC to get preg, and got pregnant right away. So things aren't always what they seem.
    Musicmom80

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 12:53 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • I know...it is so not fair. My oldest daughter got married in 2009 and so far she has had corrective uterine surgery, fertility treatments,etc,. with no luck,. She and her DH want to have children so much and they would be wonderful parents.
    And when I read that someone "hates being pregnant" or when a 17 year old here asks"Could I be prego?"....all this crap, all the time, it just annoys me beyond all belief. ANd it seems so completely disgustingly unfair.
    kerp1960

    Answer by kerp1960 at 12:54 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • With my daughter I wasn't trying. She just happened and she was the best thing to happen to and for me. I love her beyond everything imaginable. Now she is 8 I have been trying to get pregnant again for 4 years and every month it didn't happen. So I then just gave up and quit trying. I didn't use any form of BC either but it seems like just a few months after not "trying" I am finally blessed with my second baby due in just ten weeks. I don't know why good people can't seem to get pregnant when they want, but it is not fair to make out the ones who "accidentally" get pregnant to be all bad people. I know of some who planned their kids and are pretty bad parents. Sometimes accidents can be the best thing for someone. My sil got pregnant (unplanned) and she knew she wouldn't be able to take care of that baby so she met and got to know a really nice infertile couple who adopted the baby.
    angelmine2011

    Answer by angelmine2011 at 1:00 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • Good question, it does seem like that. When I wanted a baby with my 1st husband it just wasn't happening. We tried for 3yrs, then I took fertility pills and got pregnant. The pregnancy was rough and I really didn't like being pregnant, so it really didn't matter to me if I had anymore, I had my baby and I was good with that. My other 2 just happened, was not trying. They happened many yrs apart. Just because I don't like being pregnant doesn't mean I don't love my children.

    Shines3

    Answer by Shines3 at 1:11 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • I know what you mean my first baby was an ooops at 16... then down the road when I WANTED to get pregnant it would take months and months to get pregnant.
    wheresthewayout

    Answer by wheresthewayout at 1:16 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • my personal opinion is that people who are trying for a baby are stressing about the situation too much which probably makes it harder to get pregnant...i got pregnant when i stopped trying.
    courtney_legg

    Answer by courtney_legg at 1:49 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.

Next question in Pregnancy
Healthy Meals

close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN