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I don't think my cousin actually wanted to be a mom....was it tit for tat? (LOL This is Long)

Okay so here's the comparison:

I got pregnant at 17
She got pregnant 2 months after I found out
(She said she was supposed to have a baby first because she was a year older than me huh???)

My fiance and I lived together for 1 year before I got pregnant, together for 2 years before I got pregnant, we lived together, no help, no nothing.
She was single, had just broke up with her BF around a month before she got pregnant, and spent the entire next month sleeping with every guy possible
(Which led to her no knowing who her baby's father was for a couple months)

When family got upset because she was pregnant she kept saying, well (my name) is having a baby, why is it so wrong for me to have a baby???

Now her baby is here, I talked to her a few months ago and we were talking about our LO's and I mentioned how I would like to have another if I could but right now I can't do that to myself because I want to finish out my degree (I have always been a FT student and I never slowed down in college so I'm actually almost finished) I did finish HS at 16, so I had 1 year under my belt before I had my son.

Well then she was saying how she wanted to try for another one pretty soon and blah blah blah.

LOL...her and her SO have been together 6-7mos, her baby is 10mos, and he doesn't work...

Now she doesn't even spend any time with her baby. SERIOUSLY I feel so bad for her LO.

She drops her baby off at daycare 9 hours a day, even though the dad sits at home on his ass. Which whatever, if you have to work 5 days a week to support your family, that's what you have to do. But then, she drops the baby off at my aunts, her moms house, the whole weekend and picks the baby up on Sunday night.
'
Which makes me think that maybe she doesn't enjoy actually being present in her kids life, maybe she is just doing tit for tat.

Oh and one more example, she is always comparing her relationship to mine. Ummm her man just got caught chatting it up on Match.com, he sleeps around with his other babies mother's (there are 2, he has 3 other kids) and he's been throwing crap around while their baby is there, broke a flat screen TV, left her with bruises, black eyes. Umm NO My SO is not like that. She won't even let him watch their baby, to save on daycare cost, because she is afraid he is going to take their daughter to the other children's moms house. Ummm again NO.


And then She was trying to down talk me because I go to school and I don't work, my SO works instead. I was just like, yeah I plan on working after I get my degree, I can intern for now via pain internships, but I'd get paid very little, work a lot, miss out on time with my son, and still have class 15 units or more per semester. Sheesh.

tit for tat? or Am I thinking too much.

This was also a vent

do you think she is playing tit for tat, trying to do everything I do

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:37 PM on Nov. 28, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • IT SOUNDS LIKE IN HER OWN WAY SHE LOOKS UP TO YOU AND WANTS THE FAMILY TO BE PROUD OF HER AS THEY MUST BE OF YOU SO YES IT IS TIT FOR TAT BUT ALSO A BOW TO YOU MY ADVICE TO YOU IS UITS GOOD TO VENT BUT IF SHE IS NOT TAKING CARE OF THE ONE CHILD SHE MOST LIKELY WONT TAKE CARE OF THE OTHER ONE KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK AND SHOW HER WHAT A REAL WOMEN DOES JUST KEEP BEING THE GOODF EXAMPLE FOR HER SHE MAY PICK IT UP[
    momma051209

    Answer by momma051209 at 6:02 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • I think perhaps she is jealous of you and a little ignorant as well. She should live her own life and not worry about what you are doing.
    neebug3766

    Answer by neebug3766 at 1:42 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • Probably. Don't worry about it. It's sad, and she's sort of pathetic, doing all that. She needs to knock it off before she CAN'T knock it off.
    Raine2001

    Answer by Raine2001 at 1:48 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • Probably but you should try to help her get away from the abusive dirt bag instead of worrying about if she is copying you.
    JackieGirl007

    Answer by JackieGirl007 at 4:06 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • @JackieGirl007

    You can't make someone leave a relationship. She doesn't want to leave it. She denies everything.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 4:09 PM on Nov. 28, 2010