Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

my 16 year old neice came to me the other day and asked me if my first time having sex hurt and i said not really if u know what to question is what other advice can u give her to make her first time enjoyable so it dont hurt


Asked by Anonymous at 2:14 PM on Nov. 28, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • My first time did not hurt at all, but everyone is different. However, the only advice I would be giving her is that she should be waiting to have sex. And I also agree that you should tell her to talk to her mom about it. If something does end up happpening like a pregnancy or what not, its going to come back to you.

    Answer by Ash9724 at 2:56 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • My first time hurt. I don't think I'd be giving sexual advice to a 16 year old though

    Answer by onemellowmom at 2:17 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • You know, there are so many ways a 16 year old could get "hurt" having sex. No way would my advice have anything to do with the physical act itself, other than "don't, you're too young"

    Answer by aliceinalgonac at 2:23 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • This seems like an excellent opportunity to talk to her about waiting until her body and mind is ready for all the emotional hurts that can be caused. I hope you talked to her about the possibility of STD, and about birth control. I think you have an obligation to talk to her mother about this. You sound like you are a loving aunt, please realize that she was asking you for information.

    Answer by SweetLuci at 2:26 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • well mine hurt.. popping the cherry was painful. anyway i wouldnt give her any more first time advice tell her to ask her mom. you don't want to be blamed for filling her head with anything if she winds up pregnant.

    Answer by tnm786 at 2:15 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • At 16, I'd be telling her to keep her legs closed. That's the ONLY advice I'd give a 16 year old!!

    Answer by AtHomeMommy-3 at 2:20 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • I don't know if there is any advice you can give at all. It all depends on how both of them are build. But how cool she came and asked you! I'd be honered if my neice did that. (My parents never EVER talked about sex to me and I sure as hell would not want to ask them.)

    Answer by BeachMom81 at 2:19 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • Well, my first time hurt, as did most every other woman's I've talked i don't think there's really anyway to avoid that. Its cool she comfortable enough to talk to you about sex, but I would be advising her to not worry about it any time soon.

    Answer by hobbitswife04 at 2:21 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • The first time does hurt and so does the 2nd if you ask me, lol...I guess lots of lube would be a good idea

    Answer by wheresthewayout at 2:22 PM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • My first time only involved pleasurable feelings and emotions, my niece at 16 use to ask me question about sex a lot, and I always told her that before she experimented with sex to have an emotional tie to the person so that it would be a memorable event that will mold the rest of her sex life, like it did mine.

    Answer by older at 2:25 PM on Nov. 28, 2010