My child's father is stationed in Las Vegas in the air force. Our daughter is only 2 years old, but they rarely see each other, but he calls several times a day and he takes care of us financially. He has been involved with a very manipulative woman. She has caused many issues between he and I. She is soooo jealous, that the last time he came to our state to visit (this woman lives in the same state as I do), she gave him 20 minute time limit on how long he can visit out daughter. On average, he sees our child twice a year, but he sees this woman much more.
I have been very supportive of him. Perhaps much more than I should be. When he's around this woman, it's almost like no one else matters. I hate to question his love for his daughter, but I was extremely upset to find out that he is on his way to elope with her right now while she's visiting him.
I know this will only cause more issues and I feel that eventually he would choose her feelings over our child's.
I want to pull away from him (I won't keep him from his child of course) but I don't want to seem like I'm simply bitter. I AM hurt bc I do still love him, but I hate seeing him place a woman before his child
Answer by Musicmom80 at 7:31 PM on Nov. 28, 2010
Your are to involved. He's going to choose whats ever he wants and if that means letting some women convince him to see your daughter for a limited amount of time he'll be stupid enough to listen. For your daughters sake you need to back off emotionally from him and he should only be the father of your child unless your trying to make the once relationship work. The reason I say this is because your emotions and feelings will soon be effecting your daughter. The only thing you need to to be worrying about is if your daughter will be safe around this lady. You're just going to get yourself hurt and in the end your daughter will be hurt. Her father is going to what he wants if he misses out then it's his fault and he'll realize it later.
Answer by Jenaiko01 at 7:33 PM on Nov. 28, 2010
Answer by nwaskie at 7:33 PM on Nov. 28, 2010
Honestly, there is not much you can do. You can talk with him and express your concern- it's great that you get along so well, but ultimately any decision he makes will need to be his own.
Answer by skittles1108 at 7:36 PM on Nov. 28, 2010
Answer by BriHan06 at 7:38 PM on Nov. 28, 2010
Answer by WonderMom2008 at 7:43 PM on Nov. 28, 2010
Answer by Mom2Just1 at 9:19 PM on Nov. 28, 2010
When my parents got divorced, we didn't see my dad much for a while either. He too, got married shortly after their divorce. He'd call and promise to come pick us up for the weekend and never show up...My mama never let her anger show and she never bad mouthed him in front of us. She wasn't going to taint or try to alter our image of him...she was going to let us figure that out on our own. Thankfully for us, things changed...but that's my best advice to you. You can't change him and you can't force him to do anything....neither can the new woman. He's a grown man and will do as he pleases. If you try to force him to do something, you're only going to hurt your DD in the long run because it will drive him away even more. If he's a good dad, things will work out....if he's not, let her figure that out without influences. Too many children's relationships with their fathers are ruined due to jealous/bitter ex's.
Answer by HaydensMama07 at 10:29 PM on Nov. 28, 2010
Answer by amessageofhope at 1:02 AM on Nov. 29, 2010
Answer by Desi_Momof4 at 9:36 AM on Nov. 29, 2010