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What Im going to do with my DS while Im in labor? I don't have somebody to watch after him.

My little guy will be 33 months when my second little boy will be born.I don't want him to get overtired or fussy in others house, so I thinking that will be better if someone stays with him in our house while we are away for the birth. We don't have any relatives in town  But a friend wants to fly out to watch my older DS while I am in labor at the hospital and then stay for several days after the birth. She can only be here 10 days. My due date is March 1. What do you think would be better 1 week before or after my due date?  Since we are new to the neighborhood we have a few friends we trust to take care of our LO but can't exactly count on them 100% considering they have LO's, jobs, holiday travels/plans, etc. So I guess we need to find a couple babysitters that can take over at any given moment until our relatives are here?? Just curious if anyone else is in a similar situation and what options anyone can suggest.

Out of everything to be anxious and scared about with pregnancy/labor this is by far the one thing that sometimes keeps me awake at night!

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Betukamom

Asked by Betukamom at 1:47 AM on Nov. 29, 2010 in Pregnancy

Level 3 (17 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • I would find 2 babysitters, one for daytime hours and one for nighttime hours. That way your son will be taken care fo no matter what time you have to head to the hospital. If you can find a SAHM, that might be your best bet as they are usually more flexible with their schedules.
    rhianna1708

    Answer by rhianna1708 at 1:50 AM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • It may suck, but what's most important is to have your son safe and taken care of, so have you considered being in the hospital by yourself, and letting your DH/SO take care of your son until somebody else is able to? That may be the best, most reliable route.
    FluffyMamaBunny

    Answer by FluffyMamaBunny at 1:50 AM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • For sure. That can be a difficult situation sometimes. Our boys were 9 and 1.5 when our third baby came along. My mother had them with her at our house for that day while DH and I were in the hospital. As soon as baby was born, she brought the other two to the hospital to visit and then DH took care of them from there. It worked well. I was induced, so I knew exactly when I was going to be leaving, which helped a ton. If it isn't that way for you then I would recommend having a couple people lined up just in case one or the other can't do it. Plan it out early enough so you're not rushing to work out the details. Good luck, it'll be just fine!
    Sharell8710

    Answer by Sharell8710 at 1:52 AM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • Thanks girls, your advince really help me. Its is a really hard situation cause Im going to try for a VBAC and the hospital is 2hrs away from our home. I tell my DH that It will be better if he stay in home with our boy, cause He knows what to do with our son and his schedule but he wants to be present in the labor and he encourage to have the VBAC in San Diego. What about I have a repeat C-section in my town? and avoid all this problem?.
    Sounds just crazy itsn' it?.
    But I really like the idea of looking for friends lined up just in case like said Mrs. Sharell8710. keep me in your prayers. thanks.
    I just have till March 1 to found out.
    Betukamom

    Comment by Betukamom (original poster) at 2:10 AM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • We were in a somewhat similar situation. my daughter is 3 and when my son was born I knew that my husband needed to be with me (read here bipolar lady not on her meds lack of handling stress, him saying home was not exactly an option). We got in contact with my Relief Society President through our church (we're LDS) and they were able to get names of people who volunteered to help watch Em if we needed it and what times they would be available. In the end it worked out that I got induced at 38 weeks due to my pain level and so my duahgter was able to just go to her daycare even though she wasn't scheduled until grandma and grandpa could make the two hour or so drive up to Logan (not that they made it on time, in fact my baby was here by the time they left their hometown, sillies!).
    So if you have a church affiliation that might work.
    JadeRDragosani

    Answer by JadeRDragosani at 2:23 AM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • No, I would strongly discourage an elective cesarean, very risky.

    You might consider another option that will give you greater chances for success with a vaginal birth and reduce your risks: have a homebirth.
    Your midwives come to you, you are much more likely to have a safer (and happier) experience and there will be childcare there.

    You can also use a birth doula for another alternative.

    :-)
    doulala

    Answer by doulala at 2:42 AM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • Having your other child with you isn't an option?
    I had my 2 year old with me when I gave birth to my second dd because the only person I trusted to watch her was with me (my mom).
    dmdblleb

    Answer by dmdblleb at 3:09 AM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • Day care? Or your DH/SO will just have to watch him tell family arrives. You got to do what you got to do sometimes.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 4:06 AM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • If a second c-section works for you, it's your choice. I would find at least a couple of sitter options so that you know you are covered or ask a family member to come in early to stay with your son. My mom kept out older daughter while I was in the hospital having our younger one - I knew my family would come to the hospital after the birth to see us, my in-laws couldn't be bothered to come to the hospital for either of our children.

    scout_mom

    Answer by scout_mom at 9:38 AM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • Either take him with you or have DH be home with him. Simple as that. Unless you have family willing to take a couple weeks vaction time starting around your due date. but even then baby may decide to be early and you would still have to take the first one with you or leave him home with daddy. Two hours seems a long time to be driving. Who is taking you to the hospital?? You do know they can't force you into a c-section at the closer hospital. Especially if you do some laboring at home and have already dialated. VBAC's are risky business too, but I would still encourage it. Just don't be disappointed if it ends in another c-section. The choice is yours.
    2autisticsmom

    Answer by 2autisticsmom at 9:49 AM on Nov. 29, 2010

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