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2 Bumps

I can't stand this family anymore !!!!

I love my husband I do... but his lazyness and selfishness added with his mother and father... I amm able to take the kids and leave !!!!

He doesnt work, he just decided one day right before I graduated beauty school that he didnt want to work anymore.... I was mad but after awhile I kind of liked the idea, I make really good money at my job , and he would be home in case the kids were sick and i can always make sure he could get them to school and pick them up on time... plus I assumed I would get to come home to a clean house and supper on the table.... just like he did when I stayed home...

I was wrong... not only do i work from 8am-6pm, I have to come home and miss more time with my kids because the house is dirty and I have to make supper, help with homework and do bathtime....

So I have it on a pretty good schedule, I get up an extra 30 mintues in the morning so I can vacuum and pick up and stuff, and then I usually do dishes and do the kitchen floors while supper is cooking...

Well our sink is broken ( both sinks are full of of dirty backwashed water) ... I cant get a plumber until the end of next week... so I have 3 days of dirty dishes piled up on the counter ( and i went and bought paper plates lol ) ....

other then that i can say the rest of my house is clean, even the laundry there is only dirty clothes from this morning in there... but of course when my mother in law comes over to visit her "baby" she notices the dirty dishes and not only goes on a rampage of how lazy I AM ... but she takes a cell picture of it and sends it to her friends and sisters with the caption " you think you have it bad, look at what my son has to live with " ...

That just makes me feel soo horrible !

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:24 PM on Nov. 29, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • I would kick his ass to the curb
    Zakysmommy

    Answer by Zakysmommy at 3:26 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • I would let that bitch have it, and tell her she is not welcome in your home anymore. His lazy ass would have to go as well. Thats BS!!!
    LuvMyMedic3ID

    Answer by LuvMyMedic3ID at 3:28 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • seriously, your husband should be stopping his mother from disrespecting you like that. Not stopping her is as good as saying he agrees with her.
    And if you're the one working, then he needs to do that home stuff too. I'm not saying all of it, but he can help out-especially with the kids! I know you already admitted that he is lazy and selfish, but that is just TOO much
    an-apple-a-day

    Answer by an-apple-a-day at 3:29 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • wow that is terrible! He needs to be contributing in some way either at home or at work. His mom needs to show some respect!
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 3:29 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • Tell him he had better start pulling his weight. You are not his housekeeper as you already have a full time job. I would also tell his MIL off, or tell your husband to let her know she is rude. Don't tolerate this. Your kids don't need to see their mother being a doormat.
    CarriePM

    Answer by CarriePM at 3:29 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • I'm fuming mad for you right now. I don't even have any good advice. What a crappy situation you are in, I'm so sorry.
    Orionsgirl

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 3:29 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • Yes... expecting other people to be other than they are is a tremendous source of frustration. But so very popular...

    Interestingly, you're on exactly the opposite side of the fence from all the women here who are stay-at-home-moms who get frustrated out of their minds about how little respect they get from their stupid spouses who come home to a real house with kids in it and can only see what hasn't been done while they were away doing 'real work.'

    The fact that your mil is a disrespectful hag is not your husband's fault. He probably gave up trying to change her made up mind before he was 8.

    You don't 'have to' do anything. You choose to. When you realize that, you'll stop feeling put upon and start feeling powerful. Until then, there isn't any amount of servitude or sucking up that will ever make you happy --since that's all 'out there' and your attitude (and therefore happiness) are all 'in there.' Where you control it.
    LindaClement

    Answer by LindaClement at 3:30 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • what is he doing while he is at home when you are at work? Your kids are in school all day? If you are able to make it on one income (yours) I would tell him to start doing his part as the stay at home parent or you will leave. Then you can tell his mom he won't have to live with it anymore!! If he has 1/2 a brain he will realize he has been taking advantage of you.
    sue118

    Answer by sue118 at 3:30 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • that would irritate the hell of me. i would say something to her like i'm the one living with it not him cause i work and he doesn't. what a witch. personally i wouldn't have my husband sit on his a and do nothing and frankly i can't stand it when women whine about this stuff and yet do nothing but complain about it. so either you put up with it or leave him. it's all within your control. so do something. sorry to be so harsh!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:30 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • Well, I'll tell you right now that if her friends realize HE doesn't work and you do, they don't feel bad for her "baby", and she's just making him look bad....and herself. She's not doing him any favors by thinking it's okay for him to be a lazy bum. He needs to "man up" and take care of business, whether it's at home or getting a job.

    As for you, you'd be perfectly justified to leave...what do you need him for?? You're making the money, taking care of the house, he 'might' be watching the kids...I'm not sure. Sounds like he's just extra work for you. Sounds like you can take care of yourself and your kids.

    I don't advocate for divorce, I believe, especially when there are kids involved you should try to save the marriage, but if he's not willing to do his part, you have no reason to stay. Good Luck!
    ohwrite

    Answer by ohwrite at 3:30 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

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