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14 Bumps

Gay parents?

Since I have finally come out and let people I know i was Gay its actually been easier then what people have told me it will be. My partner had it pretty rough when she came out and I cant thank her enough for helping me through mine. But lately we have been hit pretty hard about being gay and being parents. Do you feel that being gay is being a unfit parent? I live in more then likely the most religious state in the nation and i was amazed at how people were having their toddlers hold bashing signs at the towns pride pariade. I dont just dont think that you clam to be all about god but you put it on yourself and your children to judge and bash other for a way that god made them.

Yeah i prolly asked for it but its cool

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:13 PM on Nov. 29, 2010 in Parenting Debate

Answers (65)
  • Being gay does not make you a bad parent. I went to court with it being open that I am a lesbian mom and I won and I live in TEXAS. I don't care what others think I am a great parent and I know tons of other lesbian/gay parents who are wonderful parents. Its about the love not the sexuaility :)

    Answer by bhoward87 at 8:17 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • There are many things that make a parent unfit. Being a gay parent is NOT one of them.

    Answer by TARARENEE at 8:18 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • I am not gay, but I'm deifinitly different from what people call the norm for many reasons, a lot of it, beyond my control. I have come to accept that there will always be someone out there who doesn't accept me because I'm different. It doesn't mean I condone it whatsoever, it just means that I have given up on trying to change people's viewpoints who have no intentions of seeing things any other way.

    Look at it this way, you can't win with overly judgemental people. If you went straight because they told you gay was wrong, then they wouldn't like you because you USED to be gay. You just can't win with some people.

    Just love your children, teach them what's right is right and what's wrong is wrong. We don't have a lot of people who follow this anymore. Raise you children to be loving and compassionate towards others. Articulate, and educated are important too! Best wishes for you and your children!

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 8:20 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • First of all, congratulations for coming out! It's a huge step, horribly nerve wracking, but can be a huge relief. I've done it, too, and it's fucking tough.
    I think sexual preference has nothing to do with whether you're a good parent or not. I know lots of straight people who can't parent for sh!t, and gay parents who are awesome (and the opposite, as well). Have you considered moving to a place where it's more acceptable to be gay? It might help keep your kids from being ridiculed for it in school. I can't imagine the stress of living in a place where being out isn't okay. I was born and raised in CA, and I came out 12 years ago as bisexual. 5 years ago, I stopped dating men for 2 years. Then I met DH, who is a big supporter of gay rights, and is fine with my sexuality.
    I had planned on having kids on my own. I saw myself ending up with a woman.

    Answer by musicpisces at 8:21 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • Is there a PFLAG where you are? It might be a good resource for those around you who are struggling with this, or even those who are good about it, but have questions. Including your kids if they're old enough.
    Again, being gay has nothing to do with how good a parent you are. Just be the best mom you can be, and you'll be fine. Being honest with yourself and those around you about who you are is a great start. It will make you a happier person inside, which will likely make you a better mom. =)

    Answer by musicpisces at 8:24 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • Being gay does NOT make you a bad parent. Hell, gay parents are better than a lot of hetero parents out there, if only because they're more afraid that CPS will come down on them if they aren't perfect. Gay couples have JUST as much of a right to have children as anyone else.

    Answer by FluffyMamaBunny at 8:30 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • – collapse
    well, i wouldn't post bashing signs or anything, but yes, IMO gay couples are unfit parents. God created our human relationships to be male and female, nothing else. (you asked for opinions, this is mine. don't get mad because it's not the answer you were looking for)

    Answer by armywife43 at 8:35 PM on Nov. 29, 2010 (hidden) + expand

  • Im not mad at any answers i get i asked and i know some ppl have negitive thoughts on it... im happy and in love so thats all that matters to me

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 8:37 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • No being gay does not make you unfit. There are many things in the world that make you unfit being Gay isn't one of them. There are always going to be people who disagree with how you live and that is unfortunate that "gay bashers" give Christians such a bad name. I am a Christian and I don't see any reason on God's green earth why Gay couples should not be married or be able to be parents.

    Answer by AshleyBishop06 at 8:39 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

  • My personal belief is that a parents sexual orientation (gay, straight, bi) is not important when it comes to being a parent. What is important is that the parents (wether it be 2 moms, 2 dads, or mom and dad) provide for the child/ren, give them a good home and love them.

    Answer by MizLee at 8:40 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

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