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Is having adult Aspergers an excuse for child abuse?

My father was just recently diagnosed with Aspergers and told by his psychiatrist that Aspergers is why he used to exhibit violent outbursts. The only problem with this is I am the only object of his abuse. Now he gets his treatment of me expunged and passed off as something I deserved in angering an Aspe. He abused me growing up and now I am twenty and he hasn't stopped yet.

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Cari S.

Asked by Cari S. at 12:58 AM on Nov. 30, 2010 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 2 (4 Credits)
Answers (34)
  • Well, I don't know enough about it to know what level of control a person has, but I would think that would not excuse it. If he really didn't mean it, I imagine there would be some real sincere apologising going on.

    Answer by Adelicious at 1:03 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • there is no excuse for abuse,,ever

    Answer by beyondhopes at 1:33 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • He doesn't have Adult Aspergers...he has Aspergers. It didn't develope when he became an adult, it went undiagnosed while he was young.. And yes, people with Aspergers CAN be violent. My 20yo son has Aspergers and there have been times in his life (mainly when he was younger) when he has become so stressed out that he has broken things, hit walls and yes, even hit people. Aspergers is a form of autism and the autistic brain doesn't process things the same way as the rest of us do. depending on where on the spectrum of Aspergers your father is it is possible that he suffered from rages as an adult that he never learned how to control as a child BECAUSE it went undiagnosed. My son learned when he was a child to deal with the rages so he isn't a violent adult but I could see where an undiagnosed Aspie fcould handle things poorly when upset or angry.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:45 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • No excuse for child abuse.

    Answer by mommasbabies77 at 3:57 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • Aspergers may be the physiological disorder that causes him to have abusive tendencies. As an adult, he knew that it was wrong and proceeded to continue that behavior. Asbergers treatment includes medication, behavioral "reprogramming", along with therapy. He can try to justify it anyway he wants but his doctor merely diagnosed a medical condition but the doctor is not excusing his behavior merely identifying it and its severity. Since your father is excusing the behavior and shows no remorse or signs of stopping the abuse you need to cut him from your life so you can be happy and find happiness.

    Answer by weirdjojo at 4:07 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • Ae you people mistaking ADD with Aspergers? There is no medical cure for Aspergers and no meds that I know of. I KNOW adults with Aspergers and no, some of them do NOT understand the consequences of their actions. People with Aspergers often have issues controlling their emotions or even showing them.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:24 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • Nothing gives someone the right to abuse a child NOTHING. If someone does and cant control it then they shouldn't be around a child. And btw usually with illnesses like this the angry and violence is not just focused on one person. I would try to fight it. My cousins were sexualy abused by their father and he tried to have it expunged. the younger 2 didn't fight it (tbh they don't remember anything they were babies when it happened ) but the oldest fought it, she told the judge what happened and asked that he not be able to hide what he did to her, she won.

    Answer by JLS2388 at 9:51 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • I think it's a crock. My bio father was abusive to me growing up right until the day I moved out. He now blames it on his Epilepsy meds, however like you he was abusive and violent only with me and my mother, not my sister. Also, he was on and off several different Epilepsy meds throughout his life and somehow all of them caused him to be abusive? I don't think so. It sounds like he is jumping on the first plausible excuse in order to make himself feel better. You deserve more than wishy washy excuses, you deserve an apology and better behaviour in the future, not to mention an admission of his guilt. I wish you the best because I am still waiting for all of that from my bio father. Thankfully I have an awesome stepfather now.

    Answer by MynTop at 10:11 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • I don't know anything about Aspergers, but I hope you don't have contact with him.

    Answer by Shanna84 at 12:00 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • sounds liek your dad will take any excuse to abuse you.. Had it been his illness EVERYONE would have had equal abuse. It should not have been expunged. Would they allow him ot use that excuse to avoid murder charges? that sucks

    Answer by mamak57 at 12:16 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

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