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2 Bumps

Sometimes I feel like I know too much.. (just a vent)

I don't believe men can be loyal. It probably started with knowing my brother who is married used to always take a trip once a year with his married guy friends under the guise of shopping for Christmas presents for their wives..they would take an RV & make an hour long trip to the neighboring city where they would rent stripper/prostitutes to go along "for the ride". I've known about these trips since I was 16...so when I first started dating I didn't have a good outlook, my Dad passed when I was little so my brothere was the only male role model I really had until I became friends with a couple of guys, purely platonic later on in my twenties. These guys SEEM like total Mamas boys..I mean they are good guys to all appearances..but they also take trips to Vegas where they do unscrupulous things, and one of them doesn't even consider it cheating! He has it all worked out in his head somehow to justify it, I couldn't begin to explain it if I tried because I don't get it. I have always felt so bad for my ignorant SIL..my brothers friends wives, my friends respective wives & gf's..they are all good women and so trusting..if you told them their SO's cheated on them at least once a year they'd look at you like you were nuts..now when I hear women saying their husbands would never ever even consider cheating on them all I can think is they just don't know...ughhh, it makes me want to stay single forever!!!

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:05 AM on Nov. 30, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (14)
  • I'm sorry that you have had such bad examples in your life. I used to bartend and I saw so many people cheating on each other, men AND woman. I also at that time had an outlook that no one was loyal and therefore never wanted to be in a relationship and I wasn't for many years. But as time went on and I changed my environment I slowly started seeing that there ARE other people in the world and not EVERYONE was a lying cheating dog. :) I met my husband at 37 and we have now been married 5 years, and he would never cheat. You can say that you don't believe that and that I just don't know but you would be wrong. I do know that cheating does happen I also know that you can meet someone that you truely can trust.
    sue118

    Answer by sue118 at 3:55 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • Those men are pigs, and not the norm. I wish you didn't know those things about them. I can see how it would scare you. I have luckily been surrounded by honest good men. Although my hubby has flaws, unfaithfulness is not one of them. My dad has also been faithful to my mom for 38 years. There are many good men out there.
    Orionsgirl

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 10:09 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • It's really a shame that the only men you know are disloyal and that you've never really had the opportunity to know decent, hardworking, dedicated loyal family men who would never in a million years commit adultery. I hope you will keep looking because some of us moms raised our sons to be like their daddies. Maybe you will happen upon on one of them.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 10:10 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • I don't quite understand why the "and women don't cheat" immediately came up. I didn't notice women being bashed by the OP. Anyway, I think a good point was made. Bad examples lead to damage especially in the young. I think it's sad that there are girls who grow up with disasterous examples who how truly bad some men can be. I was blessed to have wonderful men in my life growing up. I went out into the dating world trusting that was true everywhere. It is not. I know how easy it is to just throw in the towel and say there are no good ones left. But what is important to understand is that not all men are complete dirtbags who should never impose themselves on anyone ever again. Some are truly amazing, loyal, family men who just want a good life.
    wildflowers25

    Answer by wildflowers25 at 10:17 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • Not all men are like this, you are judging all by a few, please know this is a fact. There are also a lot of women out there who are just as bad, but don't feel sorry for them they have a relationship and in their eyes they don't, so the fact that you know they do does not mean that all in general do this.
    older

    Answer by older at 10:08 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • I don't think all men cheat or that all women are loyal. I think your brother is a POS, and gives men a bad name. Don't stay single, because your brother is a big pig.
    dancinintherain

    Answer by dancinintherain at 10:10 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • Just because your bother and his friends are losers doesn't mean all men are. I feel for your sister in law and I would probably tell her what he is doing she might not believe you but I couldn't not tell her would feel like I was helping him cheat. I would find better people to be around so you can see not all men are scum of the earth like the men around you are.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:20 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • In my mind it takes work to stay faithful some harder than others. Perhaps the men you've been influenced by just don't want to put forth the effort to be faithful. I would mark their lack of faithfulness down the same as a cousin whoo just wants everything handed to them woo is me. In another words don't take them to be the gold standard. My father has been faithful to my mother for 38 years. My brothers to their wives. My husband to me. Perhaps your brother needs to man up and stop what he's doing
    elyssek832

    Answer by elyssek832 at 10:16 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • both men and women have the possibility of cheating it just depends on the person i myself am one of the lucky ones that there man has not cheated and im grateful and i thank him for that everyday

    sorry to hear your brother is such a loser and i hope he uses condoms
    cnoble927

    Answer by cnoble927 at 11:30 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • I'm not sure how that relates to this post Babylove, but thanks for sharing :)
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:48 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

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