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should I look in to this?

So a couple of weeks ago I was out taking a walk with my 3 year old dd. Her dad's mom lives about 1/2 a mile away and we always walk past her house because it is the only safe way to go (the other way is a really dangerous street, cars fly by going like 75 and the side walk is only about a foot from the street) anyway she is NEVER out, so it has never been a problem. Anyway, on this day she was out and she came walking up to me. She hates me but she acts like she is the nicest person when other people are around the the neigbors were around. She says I ruined her son's life by having her even though he doesn't almost nothing for her (he went into the military when he failed out of college and only had visits with her for about 6 months for a couple of hours a week, which his also the only time that my dd has seen his mother. When he went into the military she told me she was gonna get my dd taken from me (she tried and CPS came to my house and after looking around my house, interviewing me and my neighbors ect the case was closed and she was told off for using CPS as part of her vindictiveness). Also, she tried to get grandparents visitation but she didn't get it because she had no previous relationship. So my dd was in the stroller and she bent down to pick her up, my dd started screaming for me. I told her not to touch her since it was upsetting her. Well she wouldn't back off but all the time acting like she was just being sweet. I just walked away but she followed. I told her that I could outrun her and I would call 911 so she just turned around. Well that night my dd started having stomach cramps that were very painful. I thought she might just be constipated so i gave her some meds and put her to bed. That night she had 3 more episodes of this. About 3am i called the doctor and she told me to take her to the hospital. I did and we were there till about 11 pm (20 hours) while they did every test in the book. She had about 8 more attacks while we were there but they couldn't figure out what was wrong with her (2 pediatrians, a GI specialist and a peds GI specialist). They sent in a pyscologist who asked me if there could be something going on. I told her about the day before and she said that it could be that (especially since it wasn't anything else). Her dad keeps asking me to bring her to his mom's house but I don't want to since I am worried for my dd. The problem is that is mom is really sick and might not live to see another Christmas, so they say anyway. Should I give it another try or not? my dd will see her again eventually when my ex comes back in March.

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Asked by JLS2388 at 10:26 AM on Nov. 30, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 25 (25,280 Credits)
Answers (3)
  • I would keep her away from your daughter. From the standpoint of your little girl this woman obviously upsets her and why should she be put through that? It may sound really cold hearted, but if she's not got that much longer then why put your daughter through trying to bond with someone (who is scary to her already) when she's not going to be able to be a part of your little girl's life for long. Good luck!


    Answer by scout_mom at 10:31 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • If your dd can understand what you are asking ask your dd if she wants to see her dads mom again. jmo. Most likely she will say no since she has a bad experience.

    Answer by sweetpea1217 at 10:31 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • I wouldn't push the issue. Just because this woman is your child's biological grandparent doesn't mean she's going to be a wonderful person in her life. You've already got proof of that, as she's made it quite clear how she feels, and she's not going to suddenly change just because you relent & let her see your DD. My DH's mother was a poisonous old bat & we saw her as little as possible because she was mean to our son, treating him like an after thought in the family. My son didn't miss out on a relationship with her, as she died from cancer (chain smoker) when he was very young, so "no harm, no foul". Besides, he got a set of "grandparents" in the form of our next door neighbors who love him as their own & treat him like a grandparent should treat their grandchild. Family is more than just having a blood relationship.

    Answer by mom2aspclboy at 11:11 AM on Nov. 30, 2010

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