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2 Bumps

how unattractive are you in the eyes of your spouse?

So when I met my husband I was at about 130. I am now at 156. That is about normal and I was only smaller when I met him because of stress, single etc. I know he has a problem with the weight as he mentions it when I eat, am naked, or if I meantion it causually. Am I just just being a brat when I say I am ok with this weight, and to feel he is acting a little superficial? I think so what...you should love me the same....what about yall?

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Tonesgirl

Asked by Tonesgirl at 8:41 PM on Nov. 30, 2010 in Relationships

Level 9 (277 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • I have gained 60lbs since I met my hubby and he still loves me just the same. He gets mad if I get down on myself for being fat and says he thinks I am beautiful just the way I am and that he loves every part of my body.
    Your husband sounds shallow. That's pretty mean. You're supposed to marry people because you love them, not because of what they look like. Did he expect you to look the same forever? Everybody changes as they get older. Love doesn't care about how much you weigh.
    FluffyMamaBunny

    Answer by FluffyMamaBunny at 8:45 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • My dear don't worry about how you look in his eyes. Listen...I've been with my husband 20 years...five years ago I weighed 250, was an active alcoholic and my husband wouldn't touch me. Today, I weigh between 135-145 and have been in recovery for four years and guess what...last July he started an affair with a fat ugly illiterate cum dumpster and then on Christmas Eve I found him making out with my overweight drunk bff at her house party. So you see...who gives a flying fuck what they think. You need to be happy with you! Oh and BTW...now my husband complains that I'm to skinny. THEY ARE ALL ASSHOLES!!!
    ShouldHaveLeft

    Answer by ShouldHaveLeft at 8:45 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • I am heavier than you are and he loves my body. I would sit down and discuss how him making offhand comments about your body (the one that gave him children) makes you feel.
    TaraK.

    Answer by TaraK. at 8:45 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • Ive gained a little bit of weight since i have been with my partner and actually the other day we had a talk about weight because she said in my face it looks like im loseing some, but she is at training and is gone sunday aftermoon till friday morning..... But she tells me all the time that im not allowed to get under 130 and that im the most beautiful person in the world even after having 2 kids...... I think that everyone should love their other no matter what, you love them for them not the looks
    mommadent

    Answer by mommadent at 8:46 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • also I can only assume women gain weight through the yrs as my family seems to - but his mother is a freak of nature and looks amazing!! so I am sure subconsciencly he is comparing me to her lol
    Tonesgirl

    Comment by Tonesgirl (original poster) at 8:51 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • As far as I know he loves me exactly as is and is extremely attracted to me, just like when we met. He's always telling me I have the best butt & chest. He's very touchy feely and makes me feel very attractive. I had gained about 100 pounds from the time we met through having my third son and being depressed. He never let on that he even noticed I had gained anything. I lost the weight and feel better about myself but he's always made me feel good.
    Orionsgirl

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 8:53 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • When I first met my DH I weighed 127 pounds 20+ yrs later I currently weigh 209 and he still looks at me like Im a biscuit and gravy...He loves all of me, has never mentioned my weight...I think I could put a sack on an he would say I was beautiful...That is actually what he calls me, Beautiful...I catch him watching me from across the room alot...
    sam223

    Answer by sam223 at 8:56 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • I'm the one having a problem with my fiance's weight. He has gained 70lbs since we first met and it's hard to find his gut hanging over his jeans and his buttcrack when he bends over sexy. I love him dearly and he is a wonderful man so i would never leave him for it. It is just a bummer that I don't look at him anymore and wanna jump his bones. He is also now having high blood pressure problems because of stress and his weight and he is only 24. He needs to lose weight not only for appearances but for his health.
    worriedmommy600

    Answer by worriedmommy600 at 8:59 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • How fat is he? Seriously? My dh thinks he is very shallow!!! I just read your post to him and he's disgusted. I have weighed everything from 70 lbs to 163 when 9 months pregnant and dh has loved me through it all.
    SweetLoveofMine

    Answer by SweetLoveofMine at 9:20 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • Seriously, you should tell him to shut his mouth and be happy you're healthy and able to function every day!!
    4 months after having DD#2 I got sick....really sick. In 3 months I went from 120lbs to 74lbs. I couldn't function, couldn't get out of bed, feed my kids, I couldn't even take myself to the bathroom. My 3 year old at the time saw me collapse on the kitchen floor - she thought I had died. She thought she did it to me because I got up to get her a cup of milk. It took my doctors 10 months to figure it out - I had a major infection that was eating away at my body. A year & half later I'm up to 95lbs - I struggle to gain weight - I'm soooo unhappy being this thin.
    So when it comes to things like your weight and stuff - who cares. As long as you are happy & healthy it doesn't matter!! Thinner is not always better. If only you could see me - 30 years old with the body of a 12 year old.
    Jessica45

    Answer by Jessica45 at 10:00 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

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