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anyone else in this similar situation? adult content

my hubby just got out of active military in jan '10. he got a job working as a seasonal worker and just lost his job 1 day before thanksgiving. now were are broke, literally. my husband is disabled from the service, so we get a check for that, but we have no other income coming in. he is depressed and says 'he'll' get a job' but lacks motivation. I have 2 interviews lined up and hoping i get a full time job out of one. he says he can't stay at home, yet won't get a new job. MANY jobs are out there with his experience he has had in the service. any previous military spouses see this from their spouse? What can i say or do to motivate him? we have 2 kids and our bills are going to be past due if 1 of us doesn't get a job in the next 7 days

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Asked by armywife117 at 9:17 PM on Nov. 30, 2010 in Relationships

Level 7 (182 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • my husband went through the same thing. he wasnt disabled but when he got out he was not motivated to get a new job and i was a stay at home mom so yeah, we were broke. he may want to go to your base and take the life after the military class. its called adjusting to civilian life or something like that. he may not realize it or maybe he does but hes probably depressed about getting out especially if it wasnt his choice. right now try to understand where he is coming from and i know to you it is huge and you feel all the pressure. if he sees that you support him and that its ok to be sad about getting out he may start to feel better. keep looking for a job yourself and when you see a job that you think he may truely enjoy (especially one that was close to what he did in the militay) show it to him and say this may be interesting instead of hey go get this job. hope this helps let me know if you want to talk

    Answer by aschwarz06 at 9:39 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • thanks. he got out cause his term was up and he was tired of dumb soldiers allowed in the army, lol. i find TONS of jobs he would like, but when i tell him about them, he says did you sign me up for it? he wan'ts me to FIND HIM a job. plus we may have him a job, but its 1 hr away and he would have to live with a friend thru the week, which i am not complaining but he won't ask how much the pay is. i don't think its worth it if its at the same pay as the last job since the last one didn't pay enough either. i want him to feel like he is doing something for himself. he always tells me to get a job, yet when i had one temp, he didn't help around the house and complained that i make him do everything . its a bad mix . he goes to the va everymonth and lies to them about his health, and then gets upset when i go cause i 'tattle' on him. i feel like i got 3 kids not 2.

    Comment by armywife117 (original poster) at 9:45 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • Pray for God to intervene and to give you faith to trust Him on this one. In the meantime, perhaps your husband may consider some counseling for his depression. Do what you can, and God will do what you can't do?. You seem to have the motivation for both of you right now, until he is well enough to offer you his support,. Speak financial success and confess God's promises for you and your family.

    Answer by PEPPERSHAKER at 10:05 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • thank you peppershaker. i really do pray every day God has given me a interview tomorrow and hopefully one more by the end of the week. I just need money now. to pay the bills.

    Comment by armywife117 (original poster) at 10:21 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

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