Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump


I love my daughter so much, she's never been a bad girl, always listened to her father and I.
On her 18th birthday she decided to get a tattoo on her neck.
The tattoo is one line and symbolizes our religion, Catholic.
Problem is she didn't think about explaining this to her father nor did she get my approval before she got it.
I don't mind because personally I like it, so now it's all between her and her father.
Can anyone please give me some advice to help me talk her into telling her father so she doesn't have to hide it for the rest of her life.
My husband is very old school so it's going to be extremely difficult for him to not "blow a gasket".

Please give me some advice as to what she should say.. She's stuck and always been there for me. I wanna be there for her too!

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:37 PM on Nov. 30, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • If she's 18, she is an adult and doesn't need permission from anyone. She needs to tell her father. If he "blows a gasket", so be it.

    Answer by mikesmom65270 at 11:40 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • I would say for her to approach it from a loving way. Instead of going up to dad and saying "I'm 18 and you can't stop me" she should talk to him about how much she appreciated him, build him up a little because he's going to feel like he failed to raise her right. She could say something like " dad I love you and you did a great job of raising me, but now that I'm an adult I feel like I really want to display my love for Christ and His church. Please don't be angry but I got a tattoo....Blah blah"
    I'm sure he will freak either way, but just remind her that his is her dad and he will come around. It might just take some getting use to

    Answer by tobys.mommy at 11:44 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • i agree..when i was 18 i got a tattoo, my parents were,of course, agisnt it but i was adlut and paid for it with my money.

    if you make a big deal out of this she will do things to rebel and hide them from ya'll...she is an adult no,-i know its hard to accept your baby girl being grown- but just dont blow the situtation out of puportion

    Answer by Lovin_mybaby5 at 11:44 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • I had 3 piercings by the time I was 18 and living in my own apartment (which daddy DID NOT pay for) and I still hid my eyebrow and tongue piercing when he came over...Lol! I would say "I don't know why...", but I do! I didn't feel like hearing his crap about it. My best advice would be for you and your DD to explain it as "art" and "expression". Tell him that she's SO proud of her faith and religion and that this is how she chose to express it. That's how I feel about my tattoos...


    Answer by HaydensMama07 at 11:51 PM on Nov. 30, 2010

  • When she gets ready she ill tell him. U was 18 too so you know how that is. My mom an dad was madwhen I got my first tat but 12 years later an they are ok with it.

    Answer by inlovewith4 at 1:10 AM on Dec. 1, 2010

  • When I got my first tattoo my mom was a little shocked. I just told her what it ment to me and she was okay with it after that. I would suggest that when she gets ready to tell him about the tattoo you should be there. Have her explain why she got it and why it's special to her. Maybe he won't "blow a gasket" if he understands why she got it and what it means to her.

    Answer by Juggalette0327 at 2:31 AM on Dec. 1, 2010

  • She is 18, so it's her decesion.. He is going to have to relize that she is not a "little girl" anymore and there are things she is going to do that he no longer can control. Maybe you can do some research on tattoos and how they are becoming more acceptable these days.. there is nothing like a beautiful tattoo. It's a form of art.
    I have a feeling he will be very mad and even disappointed but sounds like he is an awesome father who will forgive her.

    Answer by BobbieJo286 at 11:19 AM on Dec. 1, 2010

  • Yeah my daughter would be in the same place with my husband. I do totally understand. She needs to be adult about this and talk to him. However you need to prime him first. Tell him he needs to talk to her as an adult. Because technically she is. This could change things for ever. If he treats her like a little child she will never want to talk to him again.
    My husband hates tattoo's as well and would be crazy if our kid had one on her neck. (she is 18) However as a parent of a young adult I too see the good and the better. My child like yours is learning to navigate her own world and making her own decisions.
    Talk to your husband and tell him this too. Good luck.

    Answer by mmmegan38 at 12:51 PM on Dec. 1, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.