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Awkward, gross, abortion related and TMI.. adult content

I think I may have an abortion fetish. I've masturbated about 4 times to the thought of having an abortion, and while I've been pro-life most of my life I would love to have an abortion.have an abortion. I have 2 children as a single mom, though I do have a steady boyfriend. I have had 2 miscarriages, one at 10 weeks, one at 14 weeks, but I felt immense amounts of grief, then I realized when I was reading someones abortion story how much it aroused me. I'm very confused and would appreciate no harsh judgments, but understand that it's human nature to do so, but any advice or resources would be appreciated.

I do see a psychiatrist, and whenever I discussed this with her, she told me to actually consider having an abortion at a safe level of pregnancy and in a medical setting to 'get it out of my system', but I struggle with the guilt I may or may not feel in doing so..I however, can not have an orgasm during sex anymore unless I'm thinking about having an abortion of the baby that, even on birth control, the sex could lead to. I' highly embarrassed by this, so embarrassed that cafemom admin can see who I am even though I'm private, I just needed some advice. Thanks.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:00 AM on Dec. 1, 2010 in Health

Answers (10)
  • Get help, you need more help than a shrink!
    AbsoluteSelf

    Answer by AbsoluteSelf at 4:04 AM on Dec. 1, 2010

  • You all need to report this troll like I did.
    CarriePM

    Answer by CarriePM at 5:05 AM on Dec. 1, 2010

  • I AM ABSOLUTELY NOT A TROLL!! YOU WANT A MESSAGE FROM ME? THIS IS PRETTY FREAKING EMBARRASSING AND REGARDLESS OF WHETHER YOU REALIZE IT OR NOT THIS TOOK A LOT OF COURAGE FROM ME.

    I'm sorry if this offended you, but I'm really just looking for answers. If you'd like a PM from me, fine. We can talk about it there if you have any actual advice for me.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 5:08 AM on Dec. 1, 2010

  • Go to a doctor. You posting filth like this shows you need more help that anyone on CAFE MOM can give you.
    CarriePM

    Answer by CarriePM at 5:10 AM on Dec. 1, 2010

  • the fact that you have kids scares the shit out of me... this is not the question to ask on cafe mom... you need to seek help from a doctor
    FITmama2B

    Answer by FITmama2B at 5:23 AM on Dec. 1, 2010

  • I've asked a doctor. I have no thoughts of hurting my children! And the when I think about it, it's not the baby or anything, just the actual abortion itself.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 5:31 AM on Dec. 1, 2010

  • just have you husband stick a vacume hose up your vag after intercourse...
    FITmama2B

    Answer by FITmama2B at 5:42 AM on Dec. 1, 2010

  • You know what fitmama? Thanks. Thanks for being so ridiculously callous when all I've done is tried to seek some freaking help somewhere. I'm not pregnant, I'm on freaking birth control and I'm just a little concerned that that thoughts are getting me to such a point, not because I think I'm in danger of having an abortion. This isn't a "to abort or not to abort" question, this is a "do you have any resources that could help me get to the bottom of why I'm aroused by the thought of an abortion," question. Thanks again though, for being ridiculous and hurtful. It's been a real treat to interact with you.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 5:45 AM on Dec. 1, 2010

  • This is the third category that you have posted this question in.  How much attention do you need troll?

    beeky

    Answer by beeky at 6:57 AM on Dec. 1, 2010

  • Umm...well Beeky, if you'd read any of the comments I placed in another places, you'd realize that I'm selecting specific places for both better input, and various avenues of advice. I am NOT a troll, I even included in the other two posts in the other two places that I posted that I had posted this in other places as to NOT seem like a troll, and quite frankly I'm abhored that even after reading this entire thing you still have the gall to call me a troll. I am not asking for abortion advice, just psychological advice. I'd think this is a health, religious and relationship based question and should be answered from all three fronts. Again, thanks for being needlessly bitchy.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 9:33 AM on Dec. 1, 2010

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