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you want one more kiddo but DH doesnt what do you do?

DH had a vasectomy a few months ago because we didnt want anymore children... i tried asking him before he did it if he was postive... he did not budge... i asked him if i didnt want him to get it would he wait... he said he would wait but he said he really didnt want to wait... i didnt want to be the nag and the reason things go down hill so he got it done... now i want another but was thinking about adoption... when i tried to bring it up he said... i thought this would be something we would talk about in like 5 years or more then think about it... so i dont think that he wants more... but i do... have you been in a situation like this at all or anything... any advice... do i just settle with just having our little boy... which i am greatful i have i would just like to maybe have a daughter also... or maybe another little boy... i feel so selfish now... what do i do?

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Asked by Anonymous at 4:51 PM on Dec. 1, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • Keep bringing it up but when the time is right. Try not to nag but let him know that you are truly ready for another. Im pretty sure his Vas can be reversed if you want a child from the two of you. Be patient for his feelings do your best to get/figure out what makes you happy. Whats meant to be will happen. Best wishes

    Answer by Steph319 at 4:54 PM on Dec. 1, 2010

  • I have been there. I wanted one more child after my third one and my DH did not. We have 3 children and our family is not going to change. Our kids are older and I don't think he would want to adopt right now. I think you really need to talk to him and get things straightened out. It is not selfish of you to want more children. I know if I had only 1 I would want more.

    Good Luck!

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 4:55 PM on Dec. 1, 2010

  • Wait for awhile, and talk to him about it again. It's not selfish of you to feel the way you do, just as it's not selfish of him. I bet you will get on the same page at some point, either deciding to adopt or not.

    Answer by Scuba at 4:59 PM on Dec. 1, 2010

  • So he had a vasectomy?  you defently are not having a kid with him then.


    Answer by louise2 at 6:45 PM on Dec. 1, 2010

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