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if your fiance cheated and didn't tell you until after the marriage would you file for divorce?

no this question is not related to the other one posted. my husband cheated before marriage and the girl told me about it. im considering divorce even thou i think hes been faithful since and he says hes sorry and loves me.


Asked by Anonymous at 9:02 PM on Nov. 5, 2008 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • you could always try to forgive him, if you truly love him. a lot of couples have worked through infidelity..its not easy, and what works for some might not work for others. you probably have trust issues now, and that would be understandable. however, it happened before you were married(not that it justifies his action by any means), and if you feel he is sorry and committed, then you owe it to both of you to try to work it out. divorce is the easy way out , but its not always the right way. you'll still have issues with trust, and might regret leaving, without trying to mend things.if you loved him enough to marry him in the first place, you should love him enough to not simply walk away. let him have it, though, and make sure he knows this is a warning that you won't offer the next time.

    Answer by thehairnazi at 9:20 PM on Nov. 5, 2008

  • well if hes been faithfull since then maybe it was one stupid time however if it happens again then dont hesitate to get a divorce no woman deserves to be treated like that

    Answer by akashaismyworld at 9:04 PM on Nov. 5, 2008

  • Honestly, my husband did this three weeks after we got married. I let it go because I was preggo and just couldn't deal with it at the time. Our marriage only lasted about 3 years (1.5 years of it seperated and filing for divorce). If they cheat once, they will always cheat!! Especially if they hid it in the first place then LIED and TRICKED you into getting married before telling you. IF they really loved us, they would have come clean BEFORE the wedding and then let us make up our own minds!

    Answer by son_and_moon at 9:08 PM on Nov. 5, 2008

  • Definitely. I'm sorry, but I would feel like I married under false pretenses. I have no room in my life for a cheater, and I don't think I could trust him again after that. I agree with son and moon....

    Answer by KennsWifey at 9:13 PM on Nov. 5, 2008

  • I definately felt like I got married under false pretenses. The worst part was that it didn't stop there. After that, he continued to lie throughout our marriage. When I got upset, then he hid stuff from me because he didn't want to hear it. It will never end until you end it or you both get councelling. Mine refused councelling! And, now I'm a single mom!

    Answer by son_and_moon at 9:18 PM on Nov. 5, 2008

  • Did he cheat before or after he proposed?

    Answer by Star419 at 9:21 PM on Nov. 5, 2008

  • How selfish of him! I don't think he is worth your time and, even if you forgive him, he will do it again no doubt. Ask for an annulment. I mean, you both are at the beginning of your road together and he has already cheated? You really don't think he's gonna do it after 2yrs? or if you're gone for a week?? Can you trust him again?? What if she had HIV??

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:27 PM on Nov. 5, 2008

  • I wouldn't but that's just me. i would always try if i really loved someone. always. i'm sure that he is sorry but it sucks you found out even more. i'm sure he didn't tell you cause he had no intentions of ever doing it again. i say trust him until or if he screws up again. i don't believe that always a cheater statement is true.

    Answer by melody77 at 9:27 PM on Nov. 5, 2008

  • Counseling, get everything out on the table. There are a lot more things that need to be factored in here...

    Answer by KatieCrandall at 10:26 PM on Nov. 5, 2008

  • don't care when don't care the circumstance, i'd divorce.

    Answer by chyna_doll at 10:55 PM on Nov. 5, 2008