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3 Bumps

I was the other woman and now the wife has contacted me....

I swear I didn't know I was the other woman and the moment I found out I broke it off right away. He said he was divorced and I believed him even thought things didn't add up but I ignored them.
Anyways I first e-mailed his wife because he stole things from my children. He refused to give them back. I blew up and found her e-mail address he left here and I e-mailed her and now she's contacted me. She isn't even mad at me. She believes everything I say but she wants proof and I have the proof. Should I meet with her in a public area and give her what I got? I don't know what to do. He has threaten my kids and me and today left a note on the door saying "Watch your back Bitch" I already filed a police report for some other things and trying to get a restraining order. I just don't know what to do anymore. I didn't know this guy was beyond crazy.


Asked by Anonymous at 3:43 PM on Dec. 2, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (21)
  • First, I would NOT meet with the wife, anything that you have can be mailed to her or a PO box if she doesn't want it mailed to her house. Second, if he really is crazy or violent then a restraining order would not make me feel safe, it is only a piece of paper. If it were me I would pack up my kids and move. No excuses why I "can't" If there were a possibility that I was in danger or my children I would start over somewhere else. Period.

    Answer by sue118 at 3:50 PM on Dec. 2, 2010

  • Help her as much as you can. You see how he's treating you, this poor women has probably been through more torture with this man that anyone can imagine. You didn't do anything on purpose and coming from someone who's husband cheated with a cum dumpster that knew full well he was married for 19 years, I highly admire you and your integrity. Help her before he kills her!

    Answer by ShouldHaveLeft at 3:57 PM on Dec. 2, 2010

  • I would do what he said, watch your back and stay FAR FAR away from him and his family, crazy people will hurt you and your family. Get out of it and stay out of it.

    Answer by bjojola at 3:46 PM on Dec. 2, 2010

  • I would make copies of all the 'proof' (and keep it in a safe place) and I would also document of all his threats as well. I would tell her that if she wants the 'proof' she will have to make a 'trade'- your children's things for her proof. I would also request that the exchange be made at somewhere 'safe' like the police station (in case he follows her or is using her to get to you). It would be a good idea to let her know that he threatened you and suggest she take precautions as well.

    Answer by MizLee at 3:55 PM on Dec. 2, 2010

  • I wouldn't trust either one of them... Meet in a public place if you must but be careful. What kind of proof is she seeking, seems your word should be good enough? She could be in denial or want something to take him to court with perhaps? Good luck!

    Answer by parrishsky at 3:56 PM on Dec. 2, 2010

  • Is there somewhere else you can stay with your children until you get the restraining order?

    Answer by TsMommy428 at 3:45 PM on Dec. 2, 2010

  • Get a resraining order and tell her to do the same, I say yes you should go meet her in a public place.

    Answer by leksismommy at 3:48 PM on Dec. 2, 2010

  • I would let her know that it isn't a good idea for you to help her at this moment because of his threats. Let her know what is going on and do the best you can to stay out of it.

    Answer by khyleighsmama at 3:49 PM on Dec. 2, 2010

  • Hmm... how did you NOT know you were the other woman, but you contacted the wife first? This doesn't make sense.

    Regardless of if you knew or didn't know... you are high risk for being hurt right now by the husband or the wife. I would not trust her either. File your police report, change up your routines, start minding your own business. Consider this a lesson learned and move on fast.

    Answer by Niki_sd at 3:50 PM on Dec. 2, 2010

  • Make sure you keep the note he wrote you and give it to the police, (Im not sure if you had contacted the police for the note already). They need to be aware that you are scared for your life as well as your children's. You don't know what he is capable of and it may effect your children as well.

    Answer by TsMommy428 at 3:51 PM on Dec. 2, 2010