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my 4 year old suddenly "doesn't like" her baby sister, did your kids go thru this too?

im baffled :( when i brought my third child home, my oldest was in love! she always wanted to be involved in all things Taylor! i noticed a complete turn around from when my second was born, she was only 2 at the time and did not like her. which made sense, it was her first sister and she wasn't the baby anymore. and now that she is 4 and the middle is 2, they get along great actually. but somewhere over the past week she's grown unkind to the baby who is now 10 months. i recently put the baby in the middle of the backseat facing backward still but in a convertible, with the older two on either side. Taylor (the baby) always reaches and touches her and she gets mad and tells her to stop touching her and even smacks her hands away. im trying to drive so there isn't much i can do other then tell them both to stop. today, i witnessed Lily (the oldest) throw a toy car at Taylor's stomach. she didn't know i was watching. when i asked her why she said "i don't like her" and i asked why again and she just said "cause i don't" and shut me out.

she's constantly pushing her away if the baby comes to her to play or hug. i just want to get to the bottom of it? the baby doesn't get any more or less attention than the others do from mommy & daddy. i will admit my mil favors the baby but i dont think Lily knows it because we don't spend much time with her for that reason. we have been overly excited with the baby lately because she's starting to take a few steps. so maybe she's just feeling insignificant that the baby is doing something new and awesome and she's not? i don't feel this way at all (about her being insignificant) and i hope she doesn't either. i try my best to show them all the same amount of love and attention!

how can i figure out what the problem is if she wont tell me? and how can i make her feel any more special when i already am doing everything i know possible? help :(


Asked by tnm786 at 6:15 PM on Dec. 2, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 43 (159,608 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (2)
  • Pure and simply jealousy. Babies always get more attention, at least according to sister or brother. Try to spend some quality time with just her, shopping, walking, playing gaames, whatever you can do with JUST her. And, yes, it happens all the time. Just try to make her feel Special. Let her help you in the kitchen.

    Answer by Kimimale at 6:26 PM on Dec. 2, 2010

  • I don't think you'll ever figure out the "why" of it...but I think one-on-one time with her is important...any little amount of time you can squeeze in where it's just you and her will help reinforce that you love her just as much and you DO think she's special!

    Answer by TwinMomma122304 at 7:35 PM on Dec. 2, 2010