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3 Bumps

How can I give my four children the individual attention they need without spreading myself too thin, since Im a single mother

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msunastood78

Asked by msunastood78 at 7:55 PM on Dec. 2, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 2 (5 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • I only have one, so I can't even imagine 4, but what about each night of the week is designated to spend a litttle time with each child. Not sure of what their ages are but like monday play a game with child 1, tuesday read with 2, wens color a picture with 3. Maybe find something that 15-20 and let the kids know which nite is their nite with mommy.
    skittles1108

    Answer by skittles1108 at 7:59 PM on Dec. 2, 2010

  • well u could pick an activity and do it all 2 gether , or you could spend a little bit of time alone with each one doing something fun, like give each one there own personal time w u
    bekkaboo89

    Answer by bekkaboo89 at 8:00 PM on Dec. 2, 2010

  • Keep in mind that they need each other as well as you, and spare yourself the indignity of trying to find somewhere for the other three to cease to exist while you engage with one.

    People need attention, but it doesn't take half an hour --or require the absence of other people-- to accomplish. It's a matter of focus and intention as much as it is attention to the actual, real person in front of you.

    We often build up a kind of cardboard cut-out of the people we know, pinning simplistic labels on them and then being frustrated or bewildered when all the things we believe naturally go along with whatever we've labelled them turns out to be inaccurate, or has changed.

    I'd recommend The Five Love Languages of Children... or Nurture By Nature... because they both talk about how knowing a child makes all the difference --so you can meet their needs for attention the way they feel it working.

    Eye contact helps a lot. Smiling, too
    LindaClement

    Answer by LindaClement at 8:00 PM on Dec. 2, 2010

  • One thing I always heard was to try to learn what they each love to do that is special to them. For instance, if one loves to draw, another loves to play catch, and then try to do those things with them. You can involve the others too with those activities but you show each child that you have truly zeroed in on who they are as individuals. Playing board games with all of them is a great activity too and it fosters family time. If they are too young for that now you can keep it in your bag of tricks!
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 8:02 PM on Dec. 2, 2010

  • I cant anwer on the single mom part...I was a single mom of one..However once I got married the second time I became mom to 7 kids..What I found work for me and the kids was to find things they liked and we did that...For example one of them loves to cook, so our time together was preparing dinner...One would go grocery shop with me (we stop for ice cream or coffee)...One likes to watch chick flick (like You Got Mail) so we would vegg out on Sunday monday....This way we got chores done and time together...
    sam223

    Answer by sam223 at 8:03 PM on Dec. 2, 2010

  • we hav 5 ( soon) and we do group activites, and they each get a special day a month with mom and dd alone
    JoLee12345

    Answer by JoLee12345 at 10:50 AM on Dec. 3, 2010

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