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how would this make you feel?

we went over to my MIL's for thanksgiving and since dh loves the pumpkin chocolate brownies that i make so much, i decided to make some for him for thanksgiving one last time before the pumpkin season was out.

so as i was making them, which he thought was awesome btw, i told him, if he didn't at least have one that i would be hurt. and he retorted with "why wouldn't i even have one?!?" like i was crazy. so then the day comes and i bring them over and tell his mom that i made those because he loves them. and then he didn't even have ONE!! he filled up on her pies (he had a piece of chocolate and pecan pie with starbucks icecream) and when i gave him that look like he should realize that he hasn't had a brownie yet. he just acted like nothing was wrong because he wasn't in real trouble...after all, mom is sitting right there. so when we got back in the car, i told him how hurt i was and he said he forgot. and i said we even talked about this last night. and he did say he was sorry but it really hurt my feelings and i did that especially for him and he didn't even have one!! would you be hurt and now i feel like i don't want to make him anything special on holidays and bring it to his mom's because i know he won't even eat a piece of it!
and he always "forgets" seems like an excuse to me

Answer Question
 
pmg1030

Asked by pmg1030 at 9:03 AM on Dec. 3, 2010 in Relationships

Level 14 (1,514 Credits)
Answers (17)
  • you will NEVER be able to compete with moms cooking. Thats just a fact honey. Save the good stuff for when you have dinners or special occasions at your home.
    AingealsBabies

    Answer by AingealsBabies at 9:05 AM on Dec. 3, 2010

  • It does seem as just an excuse. Don't make anything he likes unless he asks for it that way he will eat it when you do make it.
    sweetpea1217

    Answer by sweetpea1217 at 9:06 AM on Dec. 3, 2010

  • Ummmm...I think you're overreacting. It's a brownie.
    Fistandantalus

    Answer by Fistandantalus at 9:07 AM on Dec. 3, 2010

  • It's just a brownie my dear...
    ShouldHaveLeft

    Answer by ShouldHaveLeft at 9:09 AM on Dec. 3, 2010

  • I would probably feel a little hurt by it. Especially if I made them just for him. On Thanksgiving there's so much food to eat though that you seriously can't get a little something of everything, but maybe he didn't want to tell you not to make them because he thought it would hurt your feelings. Maybe he was going to get one but just got too full off the other stuff. I know my mom made a special applesauce cake for Thanksgiving and took it over to my grandma's and told me she wanted me to try it and give my opinion but I never ate a piece because I filled up on my grandma's chocolate cake and other goodies. My mom wasn't hurt over it. I just feel like there are more serious things you could get upset with him over. I'm sure he didn't intentionally do it to hurt your feelings.
    poptart0325

    Answer by poptart0325 at 9:09 AM on Dec. 3, 2010

  • It is his moms house and her cooking the meal. She has probably been working on it for weeks with all the baking and what not. I know when I go to my mom's house I can't wait to have certain things that she makes, that is just the way it is. Next time make them but leave them at home for a late night snack Thanksgiving evening. I wouldn't be upset about it, it seems like a silly thing to be upset about.
    sue118

    Answer by sue118 at 9:18 AM on Dec. 3, 2010

  • If this is the worst thing your DH does.. you are a lucky, lucky girl.
    SuperrMommyy

    Answer by SuperrMommyy at 9:22 AM on Dec. 3, 2010

  • You should have saved a few for your house. You were undoubtedly aware that there would be lots of food where you were going. He came home with you. You are his girl. There is no reason to feel insecure. Love him up and make him some more for this weekend.
    tootoobusy

    Answer by tootoobusy at 9:24 AM on Dec. 3, 2010

  • i realize that to you guys it might sound silly but to me, the little things like that are what matter most. had i not mentioned it to him at all i probably wouldn't have been as upset as i am now but the fact that i did mention it because i don't expect him to read my mind and told him it was important to me, it's like that didn't even matter. and also, his mom and i have had big problems since me and dh first got married and in the beginning it was like he always chose her over me and i thought he had changed but now it still feels like he's choosing her over me and maybe that's selfish but i think his wife should be first. so maybe it's not just the brownie maybe it's because of that underlying issue with us :(
    pmg1030

    Comment by pmg1030 (original poster) at 9:26 AM on Dec. 3, 2010

  • I can understand how you feel but it is not worth it. Just tell how you feel and drop it.
    bjane01

    Answer by bjane01 at 9:31 AM on Dec. 3, 2010

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