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Anybody lose someone that was close to you?

How did you deal with it? Lost my brother about 4.5 months ago and I still wish I could bring him back. I don't care where in the grieving process you are, how are you dealing with the death of someone that was close to you? Anybody kind of look forward to death, knowing that they'll see their loved one again?

*Edit*  Perhaps, "looking forward to" is not the correct phrase in regards to death.  What I mean to say is that I am not afraid of it.  I am not afraid of death in itself, but I am afraid of the manner in which I may go.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:12 PM on Dec. 3, 2010 in Religious Debate

Answers (11)
  • yeah , everyday i wish that for myself and son to be with my mom , to go home i call it-- to myself , been 6 years ago and i will probly never really like life with out her , at the same time i realize we MUST go on and will.
    letstalk747

    Answer by letstalk747 at 9:17 PM on Dec. 3, 2010

  • We lost our son two years ago. He was 22 and had been terminally ill since 17. Two months before he died, his dog died suddenly and for no apparent reason. I like to think of the two of them running and playing in fields across the rainbow bridge. It is not an easy thing to deal with. For me, I mostly shove the emotions aside and try to forget about them.


    We played Home Sweet Home by Motley Crue (his favorite band ... I raised him right ... lol) at his memorial and I still can't listen to it because the meaning of the song changed for me. Many of our friends said the same thing. 


    You just have to find your own way of getting through this difficult time.  It sounds cliche, but time does make it somewhat easier to deal with. Remember the good times you had together. Write him a letter. I did that with my son. It really helped me say good-bye. 


    Hugs to you for your loss.

    SpiritedWitch

    Answer by SpiritedWitch at 9:25 PM on Dec. 3, 2010

  • I lost my dad in a car accident on 04/16/07...I'm an only child and I was his princesses. I only miss him twice a daily...all day and all night. I often fantasize that if I could have only one wish in this world, it would be to be in the area where they had the accident just 10 minutes before...somehow I could have stopped it. I would trade my life right now for just one more day with him. Hope this answers your question. sniff...sniff...sniff...holidays are a m*therf*cker!!!!
    ShouldHaveLeft

    Answer by ShouldHaveLeft at 9:27 PM on Dec. 3, 2010

  • I have. MAny. I lost all my grandparents,my parents,my aunts and uncles and a few good friends who died in Vietnam. I am still trying to get over the losses. ANd I really dont believe that we will all see each other after dying. I think all we have is now.
    kerp1960

    Answer by kerp1960 at 9:56 PM on Dec. 3, 2010

  • You know, whether you believe you will see your friends and family again after death doesn't matter. What matters is the here and now. A favorite quote of mine:


    ~Live Well, Love Much, Laugh Often~


    Loosing someone hurts but you still have the precious memories of times spent with them. 

    SpiritedWitch

    Answer by SpiritedWitch at 10:15 PM on Dec. 3, 2010

  • I lost my dad 25 years ago unexpectedly, and although they say that since we all have to go unexpectedly and quick and painless is the way to go what happens to the ones they leave behind is utter shock. It was very hard to deal with specially seeing my mom devastated, the one and only man he ever had and spend her whole life with just there one day gone the next. Actually the only thing that helped me was time, it does heal the wound somewhat but the void is always there.
    I am sorry about your brother, keep him alive in your heart and memory forever, hugs...
    older

    Answer by older at 10:24 PM on Dec. 3, 2010

  • Yes... my son when he was 10 days old... 29 yrs ago, my stepfather and FIL to Cancer, many friends within the past yr...

    You keep their memories alive within you and what you do...

    To me the memories are what will carry you thru life... even those that are short...

    I am so sorry for your loss...
    gmasboy

    Answer by gmasboy at 11:52 PM on Dec. 3, 2010

  • I lost my grandfather in march of 03 and it's still hard for me. Everyday there is something that reminds me of him. and in Feb of 17 I lost one of my best friends. which is really hard to deal with still. It was so sudden. He was on his way home from work when someone crossed the yellow line. That same year i found out I was pregnant and we named out son after him. It was a bitter sweet kinda thing. My husband was close friends with him too he was like a brother to both of us. Just talking about it now and i'm starting to feel the tears.

    I'm so sorry for your loss. It's really hard when you lose someone you are so close to.
    Justins_mommy05

    Answer by Justins_mommy05 at 12:41 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • I've lost a cousin 12 years ago, the grandpa I was really close to about 10 years ago, 2 of myuncles (12/16/03 and the other in April 2004)and most recently my dad this past January. that's not including the deaths on my hubby's side since we've been together including his mom 12/8/04, and his grandma in October 05 and his uncle in 2008. Anyway, all the losses were hard, especially my dad's. I am sad but I have hope in seeing them again. It's ok to go through the grieving process, but if you're experiencing severe depression i'd seek professional help and/or join a support group. this is my first holiday season without my dad and I know it'll be hard, but I'll get through it because I have peace, comfort, and love from God to guide me. As far as "looking forward to", yes, I often get "homesick", but I know I have work to do here and want to take advantage of that short amount of time. I'm sorry for your loss dear..XO
    kittieashy

    Answer by kittieashy at 10:26 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • My dad died in May of this year and it's still hard. Sometimes it doesn't seem like he's gone. My parents lived on the other side of the country so I only saw him once a year. We talked every Sunday, mostly my mom, but he was there. As Christmas gets closer it's getting harder. My mother and brother are coming here. I'm excited that my family will be together for the first time in 11 years but it's only because of my father's death. He died just before their annual visit so my mom had an extra ticket that she transferred to December. She gave my brother a ticket for his Christmas present.

    I'd like to believe that we'll all be together after death, but I don't think I can. I try to focus on the good times.
    Myantek

    Answer by Myantek at 12:15 PM on Dec. 4, 2010

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