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someoen turning on you?

You ever tell someone something because your venting and they go tell that person what you said? How would you feel and or react? Because I vented I am left feeling like my expressing myself is wrong and they are critical judmental pricks and not on my side.

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Jazmineamomma

Asked by Jazmineamomma at 4:17 AM on Dec. 4, 2010 in Relationships

Level 18 (5,231 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • I learned not to tell anyone anything the hard way. It kicked me in the butt HARD. Nowadays, I just bite my tounge, hold it in, and then unload it all on dh lol. At least I can trust dh to not gossip! Plus he cares what I'm going through.
    SweetLoveofMine

    Answer by SweetLoveofMine at 4:26 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • Depending on who it was and what they said, I would most likely feel betrayed. Venting doesn't make you a bad person and it doesn't mean you don't love whoever you were venting about, you simply got frustrated/angry/hurt for whatever reason and needed to get it off your chest. We all need to talk about things every now and then, don't feel bad. You didn't do anything wrong by venting, that person should feel bad that they were disloyal.
    Raccoon

    Answer by Raccoon at 4:30 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • sometimes I try to play it off as tho the person was making it up or adding things to what I said, after all they don't know what I really said and can't say I'm lying or if the other was. But ya I'd be pissed
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:43 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • yeah. I was telling my "cool" aunt how I was upset with staying at my cousins. Now I was 6months pregnant, frustrated i wasn't in my own place, and 6 months pregnant. lol I was just talking to her because I was alone and felt like I could talk to her because she was a woman that already been through the pregnancy thing and shoot she is my aunt. So whatever my hormones said that day she told my cousin and he was upset and kicked me out...first he said some very below the belt comments and then said leave. So when he told me I could understand why he was mad but I was hurt that my aunt would so easily tell him what I said. Like she couldn't hold water. She has said mean things about me and I just brushed it off. Like why would she say that...why would she put me in a worse situation? IDK I definitly don't love her as an aunt anymore.
    Jazmineamomma

    Comment by Jazmineamomma (original poster) at 4:58 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • I've found that MANY women are too catty, backstabbing and judgmental...and for that reason, do not trust nor do I have many friends in my life who are women--just women who are part of a couple. I also learned not to say anything to another woman that I wouldn't want repeated--because, well, that's to be expected! Women love gossip, and I simply don't have and interest for, or time for drama! :o)

    Besides, family or not, anyone who backstab another, is NOT a true friend! I have disowned family, including my own mother (for almost the past 10 years), because of such things! Life is too short to have to deal with such pettiness!
    LoriKeet

    Answer by LoriKeet at 8:07 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • I've have that happen a lot, or they tell their other friends whom I don't even know. Hence why I don't vent to any 'friends' anymore..the only people I can trust with my thoughts and feelings are my Husband and my Momski.
    -AJ

    Answer by -AJ at 8:12 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • the best rule of thumb is if you dont want something repeated then dont say it.......if you need to vent do it here on CM or start keeping a journal of your thoughts......
    cara124

    Answer by cara124 at 10:35 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • yeah now i have cafemom but back then i didn't. No look here is a funny one. A gf told me how she did not like her (a mutal friend) bf. I said I think he is pretty cool. Then later made a funny cooment (I can't even remember wha t it was) but she (who was talking about behinde her back to me told her what I said as if I was the guilty one. I was shocked when the mutal friend said something. I was like umm she didn't tell you what she said. Of course she said no. But after that I stopped having females as friends because that was retarded.

    After my aunt deal I don't come out to my family with anything. She knew I was having a hard time physically, emotionally, and financially....why hurt me? I rather tell a complete stranger then anyone related to me.
    Jazmineamomma

    Comment by Jazmineamomma (original poster) at 12:15 PM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • maybe you should have told the person you had the issue with before venting to others around you then this may not have occured
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:42 PM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • true now I can see that. I was always told when you are staying with someone you are a burden on them so you should just be quite. Kinda like be seen not heard type of thing.
    Jazmineamomma

    Comment by Jazmineamomma (original poster) at 12:45 PM on Dec. 4, 2010

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