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Bio-Father agrees to terminate parental rights.

I have a 4 year old daughter and her biological father has not had anything to do with her since her first birthday. After going back and forth to court over the last 3 years to get full custody of my daughter (he does not work, have a place to live, or pay child support) the state still would not give me full custody, and he still refused to sign over his rights. Well, for some reason, out of the blue, he has changed his mind. I have not spoken to him in over a year and he just sent me a message on FB yesterday saying he is willing to sign over his rights, and he provided me his physical address. He has a court date on Monday, here where I live, and he lives 5 hours away now. He said in the message he was not going to make it to the court date. I assume he will be arrested bc the court date is bc he is in contempt of court for not paying child support and not following his visitation schedule.

Anyways, I guess my question is: has anyone else gone through a termination of parental rights case? I looked it up on my states website and I called the district court and I could not find any forms at all. The district court said there are no specific forms for that and that I would either have to draft up a letter or have a lawyer do it. A lawyer is going to cost me $2500 and I don't have that kind of money. If anyone has any HELPFUL suggestions, please feel free. Thanks :]

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Asked by Anonymous at 7:21 AM on Dec. 4, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (13)
  • He probably won't be arrested. His parental rights will probably be terminated without his say, that's all. Usually if you file a petition and the other person doesn't show, then you win.

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 7:26 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • I didn't file the petition. The state is taking him to court because he is not paying child support. I assumed there would be a warrant for his arrest if he does not show up for his court date. I'm going to go and bring the letter he wrote me and say that I want full custody and he's willing to give it to me. And maybe they can help me there. I just want to get this over with as fast as possible.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:31 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • well write a letter and both you and him sign in front of a witness and get it noterized. yes its exspensive . but make sure when he signs this paper that there is another person.the notary this way is not a friend/family of yours or his so he can't come back and say i didn;t sign it or bla blah blah or you made me sign it. just always watch your back. but i think the other poster is right. if he doesn;t show you get custody. but if signs over rights he doesn;t have to pay for child support.

    Answer by lambdarose at 7:37 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • He'll probably pay a fat fine if he doesn't want to go to jail. They will have another hearing for parental rights next probably. It's a long process. Hang in there and keep your head up.

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 7:38 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • thank you ladies i appreciate your advice :]

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:38 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • Yes, my fiance will be adopting her, but it is not a requirement in my state to have an adoption lined up in order to terminate his rights. The last court hearing we went to, the judge advised him that signing over his rights was in his best interest and he refused at the time. Now he is willing, so I'm hoping they will just grant me full custody and then I can change her name and my fiance can adopt her.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:41 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • Call several lawyers in your area and ask if they do these kinds of cases and if they give a free first time consultation. Many do. If you find one be prepared with your questions and find out as much as you can. You can also ask all of them what they would charge to help you.

    You can also Google your state and the words "bar association" and search the state website for pro bono (free) legal help. GL

    Answer by elizabr at 8:34 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • They won't put him in jail if he goes and explains why he can't pay. They know he can't pay in jail. I'd type up the letter and have him sign it in front of the court. He has to show up and tell a Judge he is voluntarily doing it and not being forced. So if he wants out of his responsibility he needs to show up and get it done.

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:40 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • He isn't going to the court date. That's what he wrote in the message. They have already revoked his drivers license, and any recreational licenses he has. He isn't going to call them and tell them that he isn't coming. He thinks by messaging me and trying to "settle" this he is getting out of going to court. The state is taking him to court for the child support and he is in contempt of court for not paying the child support as well as forcing me to agree to a visitation schedule that he never followed. I paid for a lawyer the last time we went to court and he helped me draft up a schedule that would make it difficult for him to keep, so that he would basically "screw himself over". Which ended up happening. He was only required to participate in 2, two hour, supervised visits per week, that were supervised by me. If he didn't contact me for the visit, it was cancelled and went against him, because he wasn't following order

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 9:19 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • you could get a parell legal service to draft something up for you for way less than 2500 , look them up online in your area.....

    Answer by cara124 at 10:30 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

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