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What do you teach your kids?

Do you teach them that if someone hits them to hit back? Or do you teach them to tell a teacher and let them handle it?

Answer Question

Asked by layh41407 at 9:22 AM on Dec. 4, 2010 in Parenting Debate

Level 36 (79,415 Credits)
Answers (30)
  • I teach them not to hit back. It is not their role in this age to fight their fight with fists. It is not an answer. Never is.

    Answer by adriennfaklya at 9:26 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • I was taught to defend myself... It worked.. and no one ever bullied me more than once!
    Ive never ran & tattled to a teacher, Ive taken care of it myself! Then people know i can take care of myself & wont try & back me in a corner...
    My kids are taught the same..
    I want them to know they can defend themself & dont have to feel defenseless without anothers help...
    (Yes my kids can come & talk to me/teacher if they want to so we can help the situation. But sometimes kids CAN deal with it on their own)

    Answer by MommaTasha1003 at 9:41 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • It depends on the situation. When my oldest son was in first grade there was a kid that always bothered him and would get in his face. He talked to the teacher and the noon mothers about this and it still continued to happen. I called the school myself once because my son was afraid to go to the bathroom and he hated lunch time. After about 3 weeks of this and my son being scared to be at school. I told him, if he hits you again you hit him back. I said understand that you will get in trouble at school, although at home you will not. The next day the school called because my son had hit the kid back and I went in and talked with the principal. I told them my thoughts and that I understood it was not right, but he was getting no where with telling someone about it. Also, after my son hit the kid back the kid never bothered him again. So while I don't think it should be your first response I do understand the need for it

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 9:51 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • I teach them to defend themselves. If they CAN walk away, walk away. If not, definately fight back...

    Answer by SWEETPEAS3MOM at 9:53 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • I told my kids not to ever let anyone step on them to report it to the teacher, and if that did not work to do whatever they thought necessary to fight back.

    Answer by older at 10:21 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • Depends on the situation. For the most part they should tell a teacher and let her deal with it so they don't get in trouble but if they are getting picked on constantly (and no one will do anything) or getting the crap kicked out of them then they have every right to defend themselves (like any adult). If they get in trouble for that I will stand by their side and we'll have a party at home while they are on suspension or whatever.
    I've also told them (especially my son) that if he sees a bully picking on someone, especially a younger kid, that he should stand up for that kid and not just stand by and watch (my girls are a little small to protect anyone but my son is bigger).

    Answer by justanotherjen at 11:39 AM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • Anyone lays a hand on you - knock them out! They won't do it again! My children are taught that you do not START a fight, you END it - PERIOD! I don't like and will never encourage the "tell your teacher" attitude, cause all that does is postpone the fight and cause issues later on, not to mention cause issues with the bullies friends when they catch wind. But you step up and end the fight, or step in and end it, they think twice before coming back or causing more issues.

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 1:12 PM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • Mine will be taught to tell another adult, for many schools have 0 tolerance policies. If an adult fails to respond and my kid continues being hit, by all means HIT BACK.


    Answer by KairisMama at 1:18 PM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • I teach my kids to not hit. Violence is never the answer. Having said that it takes a lot to push my kids. My son has hit his friend. Who was repeatedly hitting him. That was the last time his friend hit him. Ouch. My daughters were tussling with him and he is older I told him not to hit a girl. He said she hit me first. So he hit her back. But honestly he would never hit any one in real life and no one would really confront him. Because he is so easy going and has a nature.

    Answer by mmmegan38 at 1:52 PM on Dec. 4, 2010

  • Right now, I tell my daughter to never hit first, but if someone hits her that she needs to stand up for herself. Just yesterday she was getting whaled on by another toddler and she just shoved him down and walked away. After that, he left my girl alone. If she's in a situation over her head, there's no shame in calling an adult to help. But if it's just a scuffle with someone her size? I don't want my kid growing up to be a wimp or overly dependent.

    Answer by soflashelley at 2:23 PM on Dec. 4, 2010

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