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14 Bumps

Would you stay with a man if he had no intention of marrying you?

My SO and I have been together for 7 years. I have a chance to move cross country so my dd and I can have the support of my family. SO's family doesn't have much to do with dd.

My SO says he is 100% ok with me moving, because he knows it'll make me happy, and a happy mom=happy child. Tonight I told him, "I could be happy here, too, if you married me and we created a home for our daughter." He said that he didn't want to get married, that sometimes he feel "trapped", that maybe he wants to see what else is out there, yada yada.

I feel like he doesn't care if I stay or go, and after 7 years of being together, I would think that he would be heartbroken to see me move 2600 miles away. What is going on? Any insight?


Asked by Anonymous at 12:32 AM on Dec. 5, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (37)
  • if he told you that you should just make the move. i don't understand how he could feel trapped and you guys have been together for 7 years. sounds like he is just making excuses for his inability to commit to you i think you should move and me closer to your family especially if that will make you happy and make life a little easier for you. easier said that done though i can completely understand. and maybe the move will make his realize how much he does miss you and what you had to offer him don't they say absence makes the heart grow fonder?

    Answer by lovingedward at 12:35 AM on Dec. 5, 2010

  • I would take my child, pack my shit and leave.

    If he does not love you enough to keep the family together...


    He really, does not love you honey :(.

    He is a ASS ♥♥♥♥

    I am sorry, but IT IS THE TRUTH ♥♥♥♥♥

    Answer by SissyAnn141 at 12:37 AM on Dec. 5, 2010

  • If it were me I would tell him to quit wasting my time. You are worth quite a bit more. Sounds like he needs to grow up.

    Answer by Melbornj at 12:35 AM on Dec. 5, 2010

  • Why would you even consider staying with this guy? He sounds like he's THRILLED you're leaving-it's his out. Then he doesn't have to be the bad guy and end things. If he wanted to he with you, he would have put a ring on your finger, or would at least ask to move with you (or beg you to stay). What kind of lame ass has no problem with you moving his kid across the country? Sounds like he's really immature, and you don't need that in your life, or your daughter's life.

    Answer by musicpisces at 12:44 AM on Dec. 5, 2010

  • Sorry hun but I think he made his feelings for you and dd very clear. If he was not part of the equation what would you do? Good Luck.


    Answer by mrsljamieson at 2:06 AM on Dec. 5, 2010

  • He said that he didn't want to get married, that sometimes he feel "trapped", that maybe he wants to see what else is out there, yada yada.


    He wants to see what else is out there? He feels trapped?
    He is telling you that he is not really committed to this relationship. I'd leave and not look back. You deserve better. You deserve someone who know he wants to be with you 100%. This guy isn't it.

    Answer by layh41407 at 9:04 AM on Dec. 5, 2010

  • Do for your dd you will find someone else that will love you & dd for yourselves and then get married GL Just leave and go live your life if he loved you he would atleast beg you to stay.

    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 12:38 AM on Dec. 5, 2010


    Answer by jov123 at 12:47 AM on Dec. 5, 2010

  • If that is what he told you, then I would leave him. Go move to be near your family that will actually love, care and support you and your daughter. Good luck across country. Sorry you spent 7 years with him, hope it was at least good until now. Say goodbye and move on. You can find someone who will treat you better than that. Take care.

    Answer by Katie80620 at 1:01 AM on Dec. 5, 2010

  • I have never been in your situation and I can only comment on what I THINK I would do. I think I would leave. Even though it would be hard to walk away from the seven years I had invested with this one guy, if he does not want the same things that I want, especially something that is important to me, then I think I would move on to somebody who shared the same goals and dreams that I have.

    Answer by kc932 at 1:24 AM on Dec. 5, 2010