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2 Bumps

How do you cope with a SO that is a bad parent?

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Asked by truthteller0722 at 1:13 AM on Dec. 5, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 19 (6,797 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • Define bad? Is he abusive or he just doesn't help out or spend time with the kids. If he was abusive, then I would leave, but if he just didn't spend time with them or help out, then I would try to find something that he is good at with the kids and encourage him to do that.

    Answer by JeremysMom at 1:23 AM on Dec. 5, 2010

  • Neither one. He does not provide the proper amount of supervision for HIS 13 year old little child (the boy is just a little child and I hear him talking to him when he does not think I can hear and he talks with him as he should be talking with a friend. This little child is extremely ill-behaved and is constantly getting in trouble at school and such and has no respect for his father (my SO) whatsoever that I can see. None of this is my problem and I never cared until we had a son together just over 2 years ago, and I still don't give a shit about the other one but I do care about MY son and I don't want him growing up to act like that one does. My son and I are worth more effort. I try my best to school him on the proper ways to raise a child, but he resists for some odd reason.

    Comment by truthteller0722 (original poster) at 1:34 AM on Dec. 5, 2010

  • "The other one" is your SO's son & your son's brother. The thing that I see in your message that makes your SO a bad parent, is that he would be w/ a woman that doesn't give a $*& about his child & what makes your parenting questionable is that you don't care about your son's brother or your SO's son. I was a single mom & couldn't have been w/ a man that didn't love my son as his own. Your man's son is 13 yrs old, his parents aren't together & if he has behavior problems some of them may be because he's a normal teenager, and some maybe be the situation with his parents. It's sad to hear someone talk about a child that way. If you're with his dad, you're an acting step parent & that means he has at least 3 parents & at least 2 of them don't have his best interests at heart. How would you feel if you split up w/ your son's dad & he ends up with a woman who doesn't give a $*& about your son? Every child is "worth the effort".

    Answer by ohwrite at 2:10 AM on Dec. 5, 2010

  • I don't know, why don't you ask your husband? He seems to be coping well with a SO who's selfish...

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:08 AM on Dec. 5, 2010

  • I cant believe what I just read! Truthteller you are something else.... How can you not give a shit about that other child? How can you be in a childs life period, and not care how they are taken care of?? You are a selfish little person and I hope you get treated the same way that you are treating that child! You dont deserve to be a step mother (which can be a VERY rewarding position)! I hope you dont have anymore kids!! UGH! You disgust me!!!

    Answer by AingealsBabies at 9:08 AM on Dec. 5, 2010

  • Suggest parenting classes to your husband and say that you will go with him so you both have more resources to draw on.

    Answer by elizabr at 9:45 AM on Dec. 5, 2010

  • If you "Don't give a shit" about your SOs child, then why are you with him?? It is a PACKAGE DEAL!!! You don't want your son to turn out like that - then for the sake of your SOs other child - LEAVE!

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 10:40 AM on Dec. 5, 2010

  • if you dont want your son growing up like your so's son, then your so (AND you) need to be active participants in BOTH child's lives. your so's son probably acts that way because he does not have a proper father figure around. if you had half a heart, you would encourage him to be a better father to YOUR stepson. he fathered both children, he needs to BE a father to both whether you like or not. in all honesty, your son is not MORE important, he is of the SAME importance. that statement was just plain ignorant. i hope this all works out for everyone involved, we are talking about raising children here and every little thing you do or don't do takes a toll on their upbringing. these are not little pets or insignificant plants or something. THEY ARE CHILDREN!

    Answer by tnm786 at 11:37 AM on Dec. 5, 2010

  • "not giving a shit".. . Wow.. And some would question why this child has behavioral problem.. Just a thought. Kids pick up on this and will act out against it. Bad behavior still gets attention.

    Answer by midnightmoma at 11:49 AM on Dec. 5, 2010

  • YOu are a HORRIBLE wife. You suck

    Answer by gulfcoastmom4 at 12:29 PM on Dec. 5, 2010

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