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What would you do in a situation like this ?

My husband has 2 brothers who are almost 20 years older than him ( he was a surpirse baby lol ) ... and we are having a bit of a problem with one of them ... even though I am nice to him and would love for us to have a good relationship with him it hasnt happened and I doubt it will ( the only time we see them is occasionaly when we go to MILs, and we do have a good relationship with his other brother too ) .... I guess I dont like them ( he and his wife) for certain reasons like he has an older daughter with another woman, when she was about 3 years old ( when he started dating his wife) he stopped seeing her because his wife was too jealous of the girls mom .. my husband now that he is older ( we are in our early 20s) tried to start a relationship with his leice ( we went to her graduation and talk to her alot ) .... and we found out they told her they havent been seeing her on Christmas because they didnt have money for a gift for her ( but yet they spent over $600 on their teen son's gifts)

So I guess in my opinion that shows how they are ....

But our problem is.... last year we went to try and buy a house and we couldnt someone had used my husbands ID and got a few different cell phones in his name that they didnt pay on, they also took a rent to own account in his name and of course stopped paying, there is also other things and it came back that we lived at 2 places that we never lived at - but his brother has !..

So obviously his brother is using his SS#, we are unable to buy a house, get a new car, and my husband has missed out on 2 jobs that he wanted ( wasnt able to get them since he has bad credit) ...... we have always made sure we have our bills paid on time ( usually early ) ... we even lived with my parents for 3 years so we could save money just to buy a house and now it all seems pointless because we dont have enough to pay off what his brother has racked up and we were also told that it will take sooo long for it to even get off of our credit ....

what would you do ? Turn him in ? How would you turn him in ....and would you still do it if your mother in law said " not to do anything, she will talk to him"

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 9:32 AM on Dec. 6, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (18)

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:36 AM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • so but i would turn it in......that id theft and its wrong.......and if MIL has a say in it tell her that the other son has ruined your dh's life by stealing his id......good luck

    Answer by cara124 at 9:36 AM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • I would have a consult with an attorney. I don't care of he's blood, that's a crime no matter which way you look at it.

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 9:37 AM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • It sounds like you have not even discussed it with the guilty brother. Is that correct?

    Answer by tootoobusy at 9:40 AM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • That's so effed up!!! He's a criminal! He belongs behind bars!! Good god if you're going to choose that lifestyle and make effed up decisions like that why would you choose your own brother to take down?! That man doesn't deserve to roam free if you ask me!

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:43 AM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • ..& what good is it gonna do to have your MIL talk to him? Is she gonna spank him and send him to his room and make him promise to never do it again?? The woman doesn't want to see her thieving son go to jail! It might make her look bad!

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:46 AM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • Have to turn him in.

    Answer by airyvandy at 9:52 AM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • Turn it in and have him pay it off. That is terrible to ruin someones future by ruining their credit. My ex BF did it to me and I'm still paying on it. They just keep coming out of the woodwork. Like a cell phone collection from 2002 that I just found out about last month. lol. GRRRR!!!

    Answer by Caoimhe_Oona at 9:57 AM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • While I would be mad at what he had done, I would talk to the brother first. Try to get him and MIL in the same room (he's less likely to just blow you off that way, gotta look good for mommy) and have all the documentation you need to with you. Show it to both of them, explain to them that the debt either has to be paid or erased. And then explain to him that since it is HIS debt, he must pay it. The only way for it to be erased is for you guys to show proof that you did not live at those addresses during the time which would mean that your brother will be punished by law for Identity Theft. When looking at losing money or jail time, he'll probably pick losing money. Plus, it just doesn't seem right to me to call the cops on family (no matter how horrible they are) without first giving them a chance to attune for what they did.

    Answer by an-apple-a-day at 10:03 AM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • You need to get the police involved.

    Answer by Dr.Donna at 10:06 AM on Dec. 6, 2010

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