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Complicated...

Today i go to court...this is regarding child custoday.

My son's biological father hasn't been apart of his life whatsoever. He has a good lawyer. Now he's trying to get joint custody so his child support gets lowered.
he knows that my husband is in the military and that we will be relocating as soon as my husband returns from deployment...

my sons biological father is trying to keep us in california.
is that possible???
we're supposed to be relocating to hawaii.

please help.

Answer Question
 
SoldiersWifey01

Asked by SoldiersWifey01 at 2:19 PM on Dec. 6, 2010 in Politics & Current Events

Level 3 (15 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • My hubby's son with his ex is in California and we live in Hawaii, most likely if he hasn't been a part of your LO's life he will get minimal custody. You will still be able to relocate, there isn't anything the judge can do to keep you in California. Your ex will just have to arrange travel to pick up your LO for his visits. If you need any info about Hawaii, let me know, we've been here for a little over 2 years.
    rhianna1708

    Answer by rhianna1708 at 2:22 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • @rhianna: thanks so much i appreciate your reply. i feel better already ; )
    i do need info about hawaii!! do i get on a waiting list for military housing???
    SoldiersWifey01

    Comment by SoldiersWifey01 (original poster) at 2:25 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • It is possible my husbands ex needs his permission to move further away from us with their son. She lives in NH we live in NY. However, if she wants to move closer to us she doesn't need permission.
    bseastrand

    Answer by bseastrand at 2:26 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • Depends on where you are: custody *alone* doesn't lower child support, and if your ex makes a lot more than you, even shared access (like half at his house, half at yours) may not lower what he is ordered to pay.

    A lot of stingy guys are very surprised when their petitions to get out of paying as much as they are result in getting to pay a whole lot more. Of course, I happen to think irony is very funny.
    LindaClement

    Answer by LindaClement at 2:30 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • Most states have restrictions on a custodial parent moving out of state without judge approval or the non-custodial parent giving "permission" to it. Look up the laws about it in your state. I just did as we are considering moving and it will be to be closer to my son's father but it will put us farther from my daughter's father so we're in a weird spot.
    daydreaminmom

    Answer by daydreaminmom at 2:32 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • It is possible he can block you leaving with your child. My husband had custody of his kids he ex never visited the kids and never paid her child support but was able to get a judge to block us from moving. We had to pay her cash to get her drop it so we could move. Depends on the judge and where you are.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:32 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • YES get on a waiting list as soon as your hubby's orders are cut. And there are multiple housing communities you can apply for. For Schofield Barracks there's Schofield, Wheeler, Camp Stover and Helemano, for example. And if you are offered historical housing, do not accept it sight unseen. We have historical house, thankfully in great shape, but not all of them are in good shape. Also, a lot of housing in Hawaii lacks a/c and heat so be prepared to purchase window units. Heaters aren't really necessary, but are good to have just in case. The newest housing has central a/c and heat.
    rhianna1708

    Answer by rhianna1708 at 2:35 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • I seriously doubt it. Being in the military or relocating for a job is not sufficient for a judge to give a child to another parent and they would never force you to remain in a state if your lively hood is in another state(especially for the military)
    itsmesteph11

    Answer by itsmesteph11 at 2:48 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

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