Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

Mother-In-Law Problem, She will not leave me be!

My husband and I invited our in-laws over for dinner. The weather turned bad, but we don't have a guest room, so we gave them a couple sleeping bags and blankets and set them up in the living room. The next morning, I woke up and went to get some morning tea. I noticed that my computer was open to my Facebook Emails, where I had recently ranted with a friend about how much I miss my home and friends. Thinking that I must not have turned off my computer last night (it was in our office room), I thought nothing of it. I also noticed that my husband's parents had left already (it was around noon, so they must have left for work). The next day, husband's mom comes over, saying she forgot something, and questions me for half an hour about if I am happy in the marriage. She says stuff like "tell me the honest to God truth" and "do you not like this family". I was stunned and angered, so I asked her to leave my house, that I needed to be alone. She left, and I texted my husband what just happened. He said that his mother can be very intrusive, and that I should have made sure my computer was off. Thing is, it was off, not even on Facebook, the night his parents stayed over. What should I do.

Answer Question

Asked by cthies at 5:24 PM on Dec. 6, 2010 in Relationships

Level 2 (7 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • I would tell her while you care about her, that this is your life, and whatever is going on in it is none of her business! You shouldn't feel weird, she is the one who invaded your privacy. She is at fault, not you.

    Answer by NAT24ROXY24 at 5:26 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • I would calmly confront her about it, and let her know that under NO circumstances is it okay for her to pry into your emails. Let her know that she will only alienate you with such disrespect. Your husband should be there too to support YOU when you do this. Make sure he gets why this is so upsetting to you. She violated your privacy when you were doing her a solid by letting her stay in your home. SO. WRONG.

    Answer by CarriePM at 5:28 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • id say confront her about it. Tell her you want to know why she was all of a sudden asking questions. and if you feel comfortable tell her some of the answers to them...then tell her if she wants to know about how you feel she needs to talk to you about not go snooping on your compter to "find out"

    Answer by chanelsparkels at 5:29 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • I would be honest and say that you're happy- if you are, but that you miss your fam and friends. I would also mention something about how out of line it is to be snooping through your things and that it may make it hard to trust her.

    Answer by skittles1108 at 5:30 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • Mothers in low most of the time just like ganges, but she may be learen her leasn and she is not going to spy on u next time, and she will know that there is limet she have not to pasee

    Answer by tahanybahari at 5:33 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • I'm sorry...

    As far as his mom goes, she seems like the kind of person who may not be willing to reason with you. You can't argue with those people and you won't be able to change her mind by telling her anything. Just show her by example.

    As for your husband.... In your house you shouldn't have to hide, or shut things down to avoid others butting in. However if you know there's some that can't help themselves, it'd be wise to take that precaution.

    Just remember when disputing anything with family or loved ones. When one person wins the other looses. So then there you both loose together. Dispute to be heard, not just to be agreed with. As long as you all can understand where each person is coming from you will all win.

    Maybe you can give some pride, and say to his mother in law. I understand your concern for your son. I respect that and it shows you love him dearly. I can assure you I love him and my actions will show.

    Answer by Skepticchick at 5:37 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • The thing is if you didn't log off your facebook...the next person that goes to log on to theirs automatically runs into yours and if she's nosy...then she'll read it.

    Answer by ShouldHaveLeft at 5:46 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.