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Drama,Drama,Drama.... How do you calm it down?

Two girls,7 and 9 sister fights, hitting,crying,yelling,name calling...

 
meleia396

Asked by meleia396 at 6:52 PM on Dec. 6, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 10 (428 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • Oh wow! Bless you and it will pass. If I had this situation I would like to think I would sit my children down at a nice lunch, at a time where we are not in a snit, and I would be honest. All this fighting is bothering me and I need peace in my home. They don't have to be each other's best friends nor do they have to like each other. They do have the responsibility to making sure my home is not a war zone and we have peace. I would preface the conversation with you are not to blame the other person at all but I want ideas on how they think they need to resolve this. How do they think we can have peace? Things will happen and disagreements happen, how do you think they should be solved? I will come with ideas but I want them to work on it too. If I do not have peace I do not drive them to parties, I don't feel like taking them to fun places.....In order for me to want to do things for them I have to have peace.
    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 9:01 AM on Dec. 7, 2010

  • One idea..........my niece has a kindness chart in her home. The kids have to do the things on the chart and they get points or stickers for doing them. After a week or so they get a day out to the park, go out for ice cream, have a special meal, go to a museum, etc. It has worked wonders for them.
    Also, I saw on Supernanny that she had the whole family play board games and do it with teams. Alternate the teams so the girls are team mates once in awhile. This will foster cooperation. Lastly, make sure they get enough one on one time with you and your SO. Plus praise when they do things right. This, along with positive reinforcement, goes a long way to making them feel special and sometimes lessens tension. GL!
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 7:21 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • I must say that I do not envy you! You can try positive things not neg bc when you enforce neg rules you will get a neg response. I agree with what elizabr said about the chart I think that will be a good idea.
    vjoaquin

    Answer by vjoaquin at 8:53 AM on Dec. 7, 2010

  • I do not have any advice. But I will say, it is sort of normal. Me and my half sister fought all the time. It was like we truly hated each other lol
    AbsoluteSelf

    Answer by AbsoluteSelf at 6:54 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • Thanks for your ideas.I will try them.
    meleia396

    Comment by meleia396 (original poster) at 8:34 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • take away extra things...and give them more chores as a punishment
    DelaneyD

    Answer by DelaneyD at 9:07 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • Thanks ladies. My older daughter is really mean.She is 9 and i love her to death,there is lots of great quality's about her but she is a mean one.I have tryed to talk to her about her sister.This goes way beyond the typical sister fights.When i talk to her she says the only way she will stop is if she has her own room, and never see her again,wants her die.Her sister is 7 and does nothing to make her feel this way.She does annoy her,but they all do that.I was the big sis growing up,and i had a little sis that could annoy me too,follow me everywhere i went,and had to copy everything i did,but i was never this mean to her.I have had charts since they were very little. Its called a star chart.If they follow the rules thy earn stars,and if they earn 5 they get to choose a reward, such as A MOVIE NIGHT,or a SLEEPOVER,or GO TO THE MALL. We do change it up a bit from time to time. I think i will make a be nice chart now. THANKS!!!
    meleia396

    Comment by meleia396 (original poster) at 10:18 AM on Dec. 7, 2010

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