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2 Bumps

Unwanted Pregnancy - What would you do?

There's a woman I know who is 36 years old and has 4 teenage children and who is now 9 weeks pregnant. She was on birth control pills and they failed. The father is her boyfriend, who she's been with for about a year. She has a job and he has recently lost his job. They barely make ends meet as it is. She is basically sure she's going to get an abortion, because she can't afford child care and has to work full time to take care of her 4 other children. Also, she is absolutely opposed to adoption. I think her father, maybe stepfather, was adopted and has nothing good to say about it...

Anyway, her situation got me thinking about what I would do, were I in her situation. I don't think I could bear to choose abortion when adoption can be arranged so nicely here in the U.S. - picking the family the child goes to and everything. We have such an amazing opportunity to make sure our children, even if we accidentally conceived them, get to live their life and be taken care of. Women of poorer nations just have to drop them off at the orphanage. And what a good opportunity to teach her children about selflessness and love! Going through 9 months of pregnancy and then giving the child to a family who can't have any of their own would be amazingly difficult, but with open adoptions, she wouldn't have to 'lose' her child indefinitely.

So I think if it were me I'd rather go through the pain of adoption than just terminate the life of my 9 week old baby bean and try to forget about it. The choice is hers to make, but I'm just curious what some of you would choose, in her shoes?

Answer Question
 
katinthehat8914

Asked by katinthehat8914 at 11:18 PM on Dec. 6, 2010 in Pregnancy

Level 15 (2,282 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • i couldnt do either. couldnt bring myself to have an abortion and i tend to fall in love with the first kicks. i would have to keep the baby no matter how much harder it made my situation.
    cassie_m

    Answer by cassie_m at 11:21 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • If I had to choose abortion or adoption, I would choose adoption. There are so many open adoptions today that would make it slightly less painful. Both choices would RIP MY HEART OUT, but I would feel cruel as a grown woman, to use abortion as birth control. It isn't the baby's fault the birth control failed and he/she was created. Who am I to end a human life? And so many people would LOVE to adopt a newborn.

    In my own shoes, I would keep the baby, and do whatever it took to make ends meet - take out loans, ask family for help, WHATEVER it took to keep my baby.

    CarriePM

    Answer by CarriePM at 11:24 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • Personally, I would keep the baby, because I feel that there's a reason for becoming pg. I was on birth control w/my youngest son and became pg. and he was the best thing that could have happened to me! When my oldest son was sent to Iraq twice, it was my youngest that kept me sane :) They are exactly 4 years apart, born on the same day.
    Kathy675

    Answer by Kathy675 at 11:25 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • I could never give a baby up after bonding with it through a Whole pregnancy. I also wouldn't abort. I would raise the baby myself.
    ecodani

    Answer by ecodani at 11:28 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • I made a decision during my teenage years that I felt that I could never have an abortion. I just can't imagine having to second guess my decision or how it must feel physically and emotionally.. My mom had an abortion before me and she talked about it like it was a nightmare, the same with a close friend of mine. I couldn't do it! I'd probably keep the baby.
    The only time I felt like abortion might ever be a possibility for me is if I was raped. Hate to put it so strongly, but that might totally change everything.
    KirraZombie

    Answer by KirraZombie at 11:37 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • If I HAD to choose I would choose adoption but I don't see either of those ever being an issue for me. I would keep the baby and raise it.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:57 PM on Dec. 6, 2010

  • I couldnt choose my pregnancy is unplanned but i can tell you this much i already love my child and he or she is not close to being here.i would die if i had to give up a child literally i would i couldnt live with myself
    MaybeMommy1994

    Answer by MaybeMommy1994 at 10:16 AM on Dec. 7, 2010

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