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i just need to vent kinda...

so my three year old son has been diagnosed with autism very recently and we are waitng on an appt to get "treatment" started.......this really sucks, never thought i would be a mother of a child with something like this..not that it in any way at all changes how i love my sweet babay boy or anything i just am overwhelmed with a sadness FOR him at the moment. i hate that autism is something uncurable, it can be managed but it will never go away i know what its like to have something going on inside ur mind and u have no control even when ur "manging" it..i have severe anxiety disorder for many years but anyways i dont want him to have that feeling of no control, or for ppl to be mean over something he cannot control... i hate this.i cannot wait to get something going to help him get a better hold of himself, he doesnt understand and his sister doesnt understand but we will learn about it and understand it as a family.
my family has uninvited us to thanksgivn this year which broke my heart because they cannot handle how my lil man acts, i try to explain and we try and try to help him but my family just dont get it, and we are also asked to take the kids over ther for a few hours the day before christmas so the kids can open thier gift from my mom so none of my family from outta town will see my sons behavior on christmas. to me this is soo cruel, my son is not a damn monster hes a three year old lil boy with a big problem.
im worried for my worried for my family-my fiance and i have had some rough spots over this because he just doesnt want to believe something is wrong with our son most the time..he knows there is but its just hard on him. his aunt who he was raised with has downs and hes seen how ppl treat others that have something wrong..and yes i know thier two very different things.
so ya...

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:29 PM on Dec. 7, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (10)
  • I'm sorry and your family should be supportive and not push you out. Stay strong and prayers for your family. Good Luck.


    Answer by bjojola at 2:32 PM on Dec. 7, 2010

  • So sorry (((hugs)))
    Theirs a reason you were given a special child--you can handle it youll see.

    Answer by raisingmen at 2:33 PM on Dec. 7, 2010

  • I'm also sorry for you, that your family, your mother of all people is acting this way. Not sure what state you are in, and what resources are out there, but take all the professional support you can get. I worked with a lot of autistic clients when I was working, before SAHM. I worked in the homes with the families, teaching coping skills, life skills, etc. The mental health team is a great help to your son and yourself. Early intervention makes a world of difference. I would have a serious talk with your mother. That would piss me off to no end.

    Answer by 2BlondeBabies at 2:36 PM on Dec. 7, 2010

  • I am so sorry you are going through this. I would try to find a support group with moms that are going through this and moms that have gone though this. Only they and you can relate on levels that some us moms can not relate to. I hope all turns out for the best. I hope you and your fiance accept this wholeheartedly and hopefully your family will begin to come around. **hugs**

    Answer by KayGia0704 at 2:37 PM on Dec. 7, 2010

  • Here is a book I recomend ... Autism and The God Connection. It's not a religious preaching book. It's more about the opinion that those who have mental health disorders (and their families/care takers) are evolved souls. It was a wonderful book I read a while back.

    Answer by 2BlondeBabies at 2:40 PM on Dec. 7, 2010

  • (((Hugs))). I'm so sorry you are having to go through this with your family.It's heartbreaking. I do have a cousin with autism, but our families don't get together for holidays We do get together at other times. I enjoy just my immediate family at holidays. I love being with my kids and husband. I love it just being us. Of course I know other people may not want that. They have a problem not you. My only advice would be to educate them as you educate yourself. Jenny McCarthy has a book about autism. Holly Robinson Peete has a child with autism as well as Toni Braxton. Keep your chin up and a smile on your face.

    Answer by chickychatter at 2:46 PM on Dec. 7, 2010

  • I feel your pain and I know other auti mommas who do as well.
    There are several autism groups here for parents and that would be a great start.
    The anger and sadness is something I think we all go through in the beginning wondering what we might have done wrong. The answer i found was I did nothing wrong but it still nags at me.

    Your family quite frankly SUCKS and they DO NOT deserve to be apart of your wonderful sons life.
    They are autistic, they are different, they arent aliens for gods sake!

    And hubby will adapt. That is a man thing. They dont want to think their is anything wrong with the boys they create. Its almost like a pride issue with alot of them.

    Work together, educate yourself as much as you can so that your immediate family understands him better and can help him progress.

    And although you dont know it now you are very blessed.

    Answer by Sandyr911 at 2:59 PM on Dec. 7, 2010

  • I am sending my hugs as well - my newly turned 3 year old is just now in the middle of working with early childhood intervention for anxiety issues and possible "high-functioning" Aspergers -we are still in the evaluation process - and test taking process but I know its taken a huge strain on our relationship ( me and dh ) And I am stress for my son as well and he is very high functioning, I am SO sad for you that your family is so unsupportive, that made my stomach turn for you.. if there is any time you need support, its NOW.. I am sending you the biggest hugs - PS.. my husband doesn't accept anything is wrong in our son either - he'll just have to get on board. Men don't want to admit "abnormal" especially in thier boys.. good luck

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 4:46 PM on Dec. 7, 2010

  • I am so very sorry!! And, shame on your mom oh so shame on her...I don't know what else to say about a grandmother like that. I'm so sorry for you that your own mom isn't supportive I am so so sorry!! Look up the book by Jenny Macarthy (I'm sure I spelled that wrong she was married to Jim Carry) her son has autism. She was on Oprah a while back and she wrote a book about it and is a HUGE advocate for autism. Maybe her book can give you some insight on how to handle this new challenge in your life. It may even help your finace?
    Many Blessings to you and yours. Hang in there good thoughts and prayers are being sent your way ;o)

    Answer by NaturalMomOfTwo at 10:31 PM on Dec. 7, 2010

  • im sorry your going through this and your son your family should be their for support shouldnt neglect you guys as a family

    Answer by photogrypher at 10:35 PM on Dec. 7, 2010

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