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Give me some workable options...

I want to leave, no correction...I have to leave this relationship. Even if I do love him, it's never going to go anywhere and I will never forget so I cannot forgive and I can barely look at him without thinking about what he did to me...on purpose no less and since I stayed when he did it, he makes no effort on his part to make me feel better or happier. Now, I have no job, I'm in school to be a nurse. I can't move in with my mother, she just had her companion move in with her and I'm not going to live in my mother and fathers house with another man there and even if I did get a job, it would be a while before I could save up to get myself a place (the house is in his parents name, they did it that way so I would never have rights to it even though we've been together for 20 years).

What other options can you ladies come up with? Any suggestions would help?

No, I have no friends, so there is no one I can move in with temporarily.

 
ShouldHaveLeft

Asked by ShouldHaveLeft at 10:44 PM on Dec. 7, 2010 in Relationships

Level 23 (16,621 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (3)
  • school or nursing degree. Talk to an advisor at your school, they might know about additional assistance you could apply for too.

    You can also contact the department of social services for some help too.

    Stay with him while you get your plan set and keep plugging away at that school. The nursing degree is the best thing going for you right now because it will be a golden ticket for a job. Don't waste anymore time on being angry with him because soon it won't matter, and it is only going to drain your energy. Be nice to him while you work on your plan to get him out of your hair.

    If you belong to a church, you can go to the congregation or pastor for help too. You might be surprised who might have a cheap/free temporary room in their home for you when you are starting out.

    And I agree with the poster above, start making as many connections as possible, the support will be helpful down the road.

    spottedpony

    Answer by spottedpony at 12:26 AM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • I would get some legal counsel to see, you have got to have SOME rights! In my province if you just LIVE together for three months you are considered common-law and have rights to things.
    I would also start saving, if you are not in a dangerous situation who is to say you can't just go on with you life and be putting away a little money here and there in a savings account. Then when you have enough for three months room and board you can go.
    In the mean time get out and make some friends. You are going to need some support in the long run. Go to a yoga or painting class or volunteer. Friends will make life more enjoyable...
    Hope things get better. *hugs*
    tobys.mommy

    Answer by tobys.mommy at 10:55 PM on Dec. 7, 2010

  • I think you are smart to come up with a plan before you leave. You will need some cash set aside. Are you close to graduating? You might need to either wait until you can graduate..depending on how far away that is, or juggle a job with the schooling. Start cutting back anywhere you can, change your cell phone plan, limit the groceries, etc. Don't tell him about any changes you make, and put every dime in a safe and secret savings.

    Start looking around either for small apartments to rent so you know how much you need to save. Look in your nursing school for classmates who might need a roommate, which also equals a built in study partner potentially. You might have to look in areas/towns that are cheaper than where you live now.

    Call the womens shelters in your area because they might know about cheap or temporary housing, job offerings, and even legal tips to help you.

    Look into single mom grants or scholarships for your
    spottedpony

    Answer by spottedpony at 12:16 AM on Dec. 8, 2010