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Do you have a husband who is a stay at home dad, or know someone who does?

I make more money than DH, so recently I went back to work and he quit his job to stay home. Everything works out fine other than the he doesn't keep the house clean like I do..lol. He is a wonderful dad and takes excellent care of our 20 month old, but he doesn't do dishes, vacuum, sweep,mop or any of the regular cleaning like picking up toys every 30 minutes..So my question is how can I make more of my time, I go to school Mon-Thurs. 8-4 and work everyday 5-11 or 12ish. How can I use my time more wisely so I can get things done and spend time with my son?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:50 PM on Dec. 7, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (8)
  • My uncle Jeff was. His wife was/is a scrub nurse and is bringing in $30 an hour
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 10:52 PM on Dec. 7, 2010

  • My husband stays home with the kiddos in the winter while I work. He get's laid off every year.
    Musicmom80

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 10:53 PM on Dec. 7, 2010

  • I think that's most men. DH is the same way, and everyone else I've talked to with a SAHD or part-time SAHD says the same thing. Men don't do chores unless specifically asked. Most of us who work from home come home and make dinner and do the cleaning, which SUCKS.
    Can I just ask, who cleans up toys every 30 minutes?
    Have you tried leaving him a list of chores to do? It would be the only option that might get him to DO some.
    Good luck!
    musicpisces

    Answer by musicpisces at 10:55 PM on Dec. 7, 2010

  • tell him to get to work and u go to school and stay at home
    just-thinking

    Answer by just-thinking at 10:56 PM on Dec. 7, 2010

  • my hubby is a stay at home, not by choice. And he is usually the one complaining that I don't clean up enough..but then he is an ocd clean freak lol

    Try talking with him about the house and such. He probably needs a little nudge or more practice with cleaning etc and taking care of a toddler.
    tntmom1027

    Answer by tntmom1027 at 10:59 PM on Dec. 7, 2010

  • I am the one who does 30 minute pick ups, My 20 month old helps by picking up his cars, or blocks or putting a few things back in the toy box etc. So he will help some with encouragment. But DH skips this altogether most times. I have left chore lists, with no luck. A few times he has accomplished a few things off the lists but usually not.
    The decision we have already made works best for us in all other aspects, other than the messy house so switching jobs again is not an option.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:10 PM on Dec. 7, 2010

  • My FIL was a stay at home dad for awhile and I think he strugged with this too. I am a student while my husband works and the cleaning just depends on the day.
    If you're gone most of the day and bringing in the paycheck then you really need to get him to help pick up the slack a little around the house.
    It may just be he needs to buckle down. I know my hubs is ADD and so needs to take his meds to help with any cleaning at all.
    If food is an issue, it's really the only solution we ever came up with: crockpot meals that can be preprepped in the fridge in gallon baggies. Like the veg and stuff.
    JadeRDragosani

    Answer by JadeRDragosani at 3:07 AM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • My husband did stay at home and took paternity leave when my son was born while I went to work. It worked quite well. He didn't do better or worse...just different. And I am in the position that one day soon I may be making more money than him. While that may be the case, and he would love to be a sahd, it is not quite doable with all our expenses. But it may be possible for him to work part time and take care of the home the other part. But we have never been the type of couple who says the person who is at home has the soul responsibility to clean and manage the entire house. We do what we can when we can. I think men who stay at home, quite frankly, for me there is something very sexy and appealing. One thing hands down my husband can do better....bake.  There is something wonderful about coming home to warm banana bread and a clean home.

    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 8:47 AM on Dec. 8, 2010

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