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Am I just being over protective???

I have a 17 month old daughter who has started doing "odd" things when I change her diaper. I really need someone to let me know if I'm just thinking too much because this is "normal" behavior for toddler girls. I would say out of the last 8 days there have been 2 instances where she has put her finger in her vagina when I remove the dirty diaper and reach for the new one but it gets worse... she then puts her finger in her mouth and twists it and hums mmmm. I have been sick to my stomache thinking someone has touched her in a way she should never be touched... Am I being over protective and ridiculous??? She does not attend daycare and has only a handful of family she is in regular contact with and I recently started leaving her with my husband on Sundays for a few hours because he wanted me to go back to work. I just have an aweful feeling in my gutt but this is not a subject I want to attack someone with if it is normal. The doctor has told me that self stim is normal for her but this just seems like something she would have seen or had done to her. Someone please ease my mind......she depends on me to protect her.

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Asked by Anonymous at 11:19 PM on Dec. 7, 2010 in Kids' Health

Answers (15)
  • i truly hope you find your answers! i wish you the best of luck. my dd is the biggest "self toucher" of my family, but there is no...tasting it.
    good luck mama. sometimes you really have to follow your gut. sometimes, you have to really dig deep and know yourself too...are you over reacting? maybe ask the dr. more questions? can you take your dd to a therapist?

    Answer by happy2bmom25 at 11:26 PM on Dec. 7, 2010

  • my dd was doing the same thing its is just a faze it should pass as she got older i talk to her.let her know it is ok but not nice to do in front of people. always be open with your dd

    Answer by kat116 at 1:00 AM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • Normal for kids to self stim at that age (hmm, come to think of it, a lot of people just get better at it eh boys!) and normal for kids to put their fingers in their mouths. Unless she were displaying some sort of emotional distress I don't think I'd be looking for trouble. Way to keep a watchlu eye on your baby - KUDOS to you!

    Answer by raynestar at 3:21 AM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • I think it's normal. Relax momma. My cousin used to do that when she was around 1-2 years old. We thought it was odd, but she was in no way abused. She would literally dig a hole in her diaper to touch herself.

    Answer by Shanna84 at 8:50 AM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • I think it's totally normal. Our son does it with his bum. It's just like automatic for them to "taste" everything. Totally gross, but it's just a part of exploring. I highly doubt anything bad happened to her momma. Promise. It's just a phase. Just keep her from doing it and teaching her to wash her hands after touching down there etc. :)

    Answer by Mipsy at 1:39 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • Also wanted to add our son doesn't do it like all the time, it's rare, but he does do it. It's just a phase.

    Answer by Mipsy at 1:39 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • Thank you all so much for your answers. I feel much better about it being just another phase so I will put my gutt aside for now but my eyes are wide open for any distressed feelings from her. I was luckily never sexually abused as a child but I see on talk shows etc that the abusers don't necessarily 'hurt" the child they more make it fun which scares the hell out of me!!! UGH... Can ya tell this is my first child, LOL... My husbands father molested his sister and step sister which I guess is why I am so over protective, sometimes the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. I know I shouldn't think bad of my husband just because of something his father did but I think thats exactly what I'm doing.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:22 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • It is totally normal behavior for her, She just discovered a new body part.

    BTW, you may want to think about counseling to learn how to trust your husband. I really hope you don't say that you don't trust him because of what his father did. That would be a good way for him to leave. TRUST is the number one thing needed in a relationship, without trust there is no relationship.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 9:59 PM on Dec. 9, 2010

  • She is just a baby, that sounds normal and if she is only with people you trust then I would try to relax a bit.

    Answer by KTMOM at 7:41 PM on Dec. 10, 2010

  • I think it's normal, but I'd be on the look out for other signs.

    Answer by LovingSAHMommy at 7:20 PM on Dec. 11, 2010

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