I'm an organizer of a mom/play group locally. I am also studying to be a certified nurse midwife. Over the summer, I took a microbiology class, and it got me really fired up about vaccination. I posted something on FB about it, stating that it's a public health issue, and talking about the resurgence of diseases like measles and whooping cough due to declining rates of vaccination and misinformation about the MMR/autism link, among others (not the issue here, please no comments about vaxing or the other specific issues here). Moms in the group that I am friends with, and with whom I've discussed vaccinating (many of them have done their research, and for their own reasons, selectively vax or don't vax) made defensive comments about the post. Then later, when Hyland's teething tablets were recalled, I posted an article about the recall and the dangers of belladonna (as that was what was behind the recall). I got the same moms PO'd at me, saying how they felt targeted. I reminded them that I use the tablets with my own child, and in no way did I mean to offend anyone.
Today, one of them, who has a link connected to the forum on the group website, posted a very one-sided blog against circumcision. I'm not a fan, but that's my choice. The woman who wrote the blog has two daughters, and has never had to make that decision for her children. Another good friend of ours, however, felt attacked, as she chose to circ her two sons, and she was especially PO'd about it after the treatment I got with the posts I made (which were both research based). That's the part that gets me about this, too.
My question is, do I say anything to my friend that posted this blog? Other moms in the group read it as well (we have about 100 local moms in the group), and I know some of them circ. I haven't said anything yet, but I want to say something about considering the parenting choices of our friends, when it comes to something linked to the group. It upset me that they were all over me on FB, which isn't linked to our group site, then this happens on her blog, that IS connected to the site. I realize on blogs (and FB, for that matter) people can post whatever they want. However, one of the goals of our group is to create a safe place for all moms, regardless of their parenting choices (within the law, anyway). Do I say anything?
Answer by amessageofhope at 12:47 AM on Dec. 8, 2010
Answer by JadeRDragosani at 2:53 AM on Dec. 8, 2010
you have the right to your opinion. And you have some additional insight given your career path. But they are just opinions (even if they are soon to be professional options) and people have the right to dismiss or consider your thoughts. I find that when opinions are given, if someone is on the opposite side of the issue, then they feel as if they are being attacked for the decisions they made as a parent. In essence, they feel like the person is saying you harmed your child by the dumb ass decision based on a dumb ass opinion. When the person giving their POV was never suggesting that. When it involves decisions that impact kids...it gets heated. So you can either remind them that this is just a discussion and moderate or you can remind them it is just a discussion and give your opinion. But sometimes some people just like the drama.
Answer by frogdawg at 8:36 AM on Dec. 8, 2010