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If you are over 40???

Do you still have a strong sex drive? Does your DH/Partner? Do you think sex has become boring? Hubby mentioned that he loves our sex but it becomes boring? How would you feel?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:08 PM on Dec. 8, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • I am 54 and I love having sex with my 56 year old husband and we do it 2 or 3 times a week. Have him define "boring" and what it is he wants that would make it more exciting. Is he looking at porn? That could make him less interested in regular sex with his wife.

    Answer by kathyartist2007 at 12:17 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • I'm 48 (hubs is 49).

    My sex drive is extremely high (the one good thing about Perimenopause so far.. lol). My husband's sex drive is still incredibly high as well. Our sex life is many things (passionate, sexy, wild, fun..etc) but **never** boring. We greatly enjoy our sex life, and we put a lot of effort into it (lol).

    If my husband shared with me that he felt sex was becoming "boring" it would be time for some good open and honest communication. We would discuss what he was finding boring, and why he was finding it boring. Then discuss how we could work together to make it better. A big part of having a happy/healthy/mutually satisfying and mutually pleasurable sex life is being able to honestly and openly communicate with one another about sex. That communication helps my husband and I understand each other's needs/desires/wants/fantasies/ etc. Knowing those things, helps to keep our sex life exciting.

    Answer by pixie_trix at 12:26 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • who are you people??? LOL I am 44 and I really hardly have the desire for sex. Once my DH and I get started I enjoy it but I rarely feel like doing it I kind have to make myself. Is there something wrong with me? I totally love my husband and find him attractive but just don't feel like having sex.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:34 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • I'm 41 and I do have a good sex drive. My husband is the sort of person who will defer to me when it comes to initiation, so getting an accurate reading on his true drive is difficult.
    I think that if my husband said that our sex life had become boring I'd use the occasion as an opportunity to begin a nice conversation about ways to enhance things. I'd actually jump at the chance to hear his thoughts, he's not very talkative on the subject in general.

    Answer by Fistandantalus at 12:34 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • Uhhh...I'm 43 and my husband is 10 years older and we're both very active. I think it's about the people and the relationship, not the ages of those involved.


    Answer by 1smartcookie at 1:16 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • I don't usually answer these type of questions but, found this interesting. I'm 67 and I have a very healthy sex drive. Been married forever and a lot of it is how you get along out of bed will depend on how things go in bed. I don't do tricks, dress up or go overboard like that, but sure it is fun for those that do, that's just not me. As for your question, sometimes men find it very hard to express themselves when it comes to the bedroom, but would ask him during your "prep" time what he'd like different........just a thought.


    Answer by zbee at 1:20 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • I'm on the verge of 40 (39). And I agree with the pp that said this isn't an age thing as much as a sex issue. I would ask him what he finds boring and ask him what you two can do to spice it up. I can't say that it doesn't get routine at times, but we realize it together and get creative. And I'm not a role player or someone dresses up either.

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 2:39 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • I'm in my 50's. When things get in a rut for us we just change our game plan. We make adult "playdates". We try new things and keep it from getting boring. We keep it fun. Once we lose our sense of humor over it, then I would think it would be over.

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:43 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

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