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What would you have done?

My 2 1/2 year old doesn't listen at all. So just now I told him and the 3 year old I babysit to take all the blocks they threw down the stairs and take them back up before lunch. The 3 year old started doing it. My son says no. So I explain to him no lunch until it's cleaned. Still no. So I spanked him. So now he's sitting and crying hysterically. I pick him up, put a toy in his hand, carry him up and put them down. So now he's sitting at the top of the stairs crying hysterically. He maybe picked up 5 out of the billions of toys. The 3 year old did the rest. As soon as they were picked up he stopped crying. Instantly. So it was just about the clean up.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:21 PM on Dec. 8, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (10)
  • If it were me, I would have just told him if he didn't pick them up and put them away he would not be allowed to play with any more toys until he picked them up. I would have had the other boy pick up half. Then they both could eat and the other boy could take out new toys to play with after lunch where your boy could not until he cleaned up ;the first mess. Period, cry all he wants no toys till he picks up.

    Answer by sue118 at 1:26 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • When our preschools had this problem it was often caused by some over you have alot of toys out? if so consider putting some a way and see what happens...when my own kids dont clean up after asking repeatedly i say if i have to do it something gets put up for a few days works like a charm for my crew

    Answer by rebeccadac at 1:26 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • Maybe made a game out of it? Show him how to toss the blocks back up the steps. Or had the 2 kids race to see who could get done first.
    I know when a 2 yr old is screaming the last thing on our minds is happy games but sometimes they work better than straight punishments.

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 1:27 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • Sounds like he's testing you. Can you make cleanup a game? See how fast they can get it done? Special treat for doing it? Don't do it, no treat. Stand firm on that. If you do time-out, remember it's 1 minute for every year of their age.

    Answer by Kimimale at 1:29 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • I think you should have followed through with the no lunch and not spanked him. If you had just lef thim to clean and if he asked for lunch you told him "Not until the toys are cleaned" You might have avoided the crying. Also, I would not have let the 3 year old clean everything up himself. I would have left some fr my son to clean up. Also, if might be a thing where you need to help them clean. Maybe your son knows that the other child will clean up so he acts up because then he won't have to do it. Kids are much smarter then we think and it sounds like he understands that.

    You could also try a time out. Mayba a place were he can go to calm down before he helps.

    Good Luck!

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 1:31 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • I would NOT start with giving them something for doing it. that sets a bad precident. Whatever you do DON"t be one of those parents always having to dangle a carrot in front of their kid to get them to do something!

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:32 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • Normally he does help clean up. And time out does not work at all for him. He'll just sit there and then get up like nothing happened. And I think if I had just left him until he cleaned up he would have just cried and cried. He's a horrible combo of stubborn and sensitive.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 1:34 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • crying isn't going to hurt him, he is just wearing you down and that is what he wants. When I hear parents say time outs dont' work because of this or that...have you ever watched the nanny show, she will make them keep putting them back on time outs for HOURS she is persistant until the child does what they have been told. I think its the parents that give up and give in to the kid throwing the tantrum or not doing what their told and the kid knows they can always win.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:44 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • My daughter tired to pull the same crap. I made her pick them all up regardless if she was crying..
    Sometimes I look her in the eyes and talk to her like an adult and tell her " come on baby help mommy clean up" sometimes that works if you talk to them in a nice tone...
    another thing we do is sing "clean up time" and she sings along and picks up her toys.. we will also make it a lil game where i start actting goofy telling get go get hurry hurrry hurry and i run up behind her if she doesnt grab it in time and i start to tickle her...(thats only if your not in a rush)

    Answer by MissChunkyLuv at 4:23 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • I totally agree with MissChunkyLuv.
    Remember too, they are little!

    I don't think children of that age are fully capable of "clean up" by themselves yet, at least not all the time. If I start cleaning and singing a clean up song or help my son, it's usually not a problem.
    Unless your goal is to teach him to follow orders, he will learn to clean up by seeing you clean up, and you find ways to include him in the activity that he sees you benefiting from.

    Answer by boomamma at 11:22 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

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