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Would you tell a Friend to "Grow Up"?

I know this woman, she has 2 small kids. She sits on the computer ALL day while the kids watch TV or sleep. There's very little interaction except the basics-food, clothing, etc.
She isn't married but her SO lives there, and so does a male room mate (to help with bills).
She's in her late 20's and college educated. What a waste.
Would you say something or mind your own business?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:33 PM on Dec. 8, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • I would mind my own business. Let her live her life the way she wants, it's none of your business how she runs her life or household. If she is asking you for advice, then you give it. That is the only time it is OK.

    Answer by samurai_chica at 1:35 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • It would depend on how close I was to her and if I felt that the kids were in some way being neglected and if I felt the children were unhappy about it. I have a freind who's DD will say things to me and I can tell she is sad about her mom not doing somethings with her. I am good friends with her so I will mention it to her, alot of the times she is kind of shocked and says she didn't think her dd would feel that way. Maybe your friend just doesn't see other ways to raise her kids she is young so maybe she needs the guidence. You have to be nice about it, helpful not accusatory.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:37 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • It would depend what kind of friend you are my real friends i would expect to be brutaly honest but casual friend probaly mind your business, she wouldn't appriciate the remark

    Answer by raisingmen at 1:38 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • IS she a really good friend to you? I think it's ok to tell her in a nice way what's wrong, you're concerned because you don't seem very happy, if you're worried aobut her then I would talk to her, however, there will be no effect if you say to her simply to grow up!
    Good luck!

    Answer by Sillylins at 1:38 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • Nope. I have many choice words for my friend but I keep my mouth shut. It's her life and I am simply her friend, not her boss.

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 1:38 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • I'd mind my own business

    Answer by admckenzie at 1:39 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • I would mind your own business. I can't imagine two small kids watching tv or sleeping for the entire day, and if you ever were at home with two small children, you would know that she couldn't possibly sit on the computer all day, even if she wanted to.

    Dishes, laundry, and cleaning have to be done, as well as meals and snacks throughout the day for the little ones.

    If she was neglecting her children, then sure, say something, but IMO you can't possibly have a clue what her daily life is like if you are stating that the "small" kiddos watch tv or sleep all day.

    Answer by twin_mommy at 1:39 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • I would not say anything unless she asks you. It is her life and while it might bother you or annoy you, you can't change her. Maybe she doesn't think she is doing anything wrong and is enjoying her life. Everyone makes their own decisions and we can't always get involved in them.

    The only way I would say something is if she is a very close friend that won't get mad at me. I am not sure that lossing a friend over something like this is worth it.

    Good Luck!

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 1:41 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • I would stay out of it unless the children are obviously suffering due to any kind of neglect. How she chooses to live her life is her own business. You may feel that what she is doing is wrong and a waste of a good education, but, apparently, she seems to be quite content. As I said, unless the children are suffering don't get involved.

    Answer by Treefrog64 at 1:47 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • Depends on how close you are and whether or not you were ready for her to stop talking to you.

    Answer by Mena929 at 2:03 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

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