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I pierce my daughters ears and her daddy doesn't know.

I did it for her birthday. Ever since she was born I wanted to pierce her ears. I did do it when she was 6 months old while husband was deployed. He was fine with it until he's mother put her 2 cents into it then all of a sudden he changed his mind. The earrings were taken out.
She just had a birthday and I pierced her ears. He's deployed and won't be home for another 6 months. I haven't said a thing to him but I do send pics of her to him so I'm surprised he hasn't noticed. My MIL knows and keeps asking when am I going to tell him and I keep saying I'm not.
I think she told him but he just hasn't said anything to me.
I'm just upset that when we agree on something he changes his mind if he's mother has a different opinion. This is OUR marriage not hers and I've talk to him but it doesn't get better.
I know I'm wrong but I think it's really unfair for me to deal with what his mother wants. Anyone else have a middling MIL.


Asked by Anonymous at 4:09 PM on Dec. 8, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • I don't see why having your little girls ears pierced is such a big deal?

    Answer by TARARENEE at 4:12 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • It should be your choice, you're the mom. Who cares anyway, it's not harming her in any way and it's cute. I don't think your husband cares either way... he probably just feels pressure to feel a certain way after ur MIL puts her opinion in. I bet if she loved it, he would love it too.

    Answer by Mamma2E at 4:17 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • I pierced my daughters ears when she was eleven weeks old. Being born in Brazil, I had my ears pierced before I left the hospital after birth. You should have told him just because she is yours AND his, and of course if his MIL found out, then it's just going to create drama. I would have used whatever reasoning you did in the first place (when she was 6mth) to remind him he was once fine with it. As for your MIL's continual input- that's tough. Maybe have a sit down with her and straight up tell her that you don't want her opinion unless you ask for it. good luck!!

    Answer by lexi8622 at 4:19 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • Most men are mama's boys. My husband and I went to marital counseling years ago just so that the counselor could tell him that he married me, so unless he plans to spend the rest of his life with his mother, he better shift his attention to me and what I think. He still gets hung up on what his mom thinks now and then. If it's something small, I just ignore it, but I do say something if I have a strong opinion or if it's something that upsets me. MIL's just suck sometimes.

    Answer by pumpkins_mama at 4:19 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • Well this is an issue that should be between the 2 of you, and NOT his mother! YOU are the parents, and you both need to be 'on the same page' in regards to the child. I would speak up and let him know you did it, and this is how it is going to stay - and if his mom does not like it TOO BAD! She needs to mind her OWN business!

    Answer by MizLee at 4:23 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • If your kiddo wanted her ears done, what is the big deal,, I would just tell DAD, I would think being away is more stress than pierced ears!!!

    Answer by kimigogo at 4:24 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • Sounds kinda like a momma's boy (no offense) and needs to form his own opinions. I would be upset if my daughters father did it but that's because I have primary custody of her and he needs to ask me before he does it. I dont' have to ask his permission though. My ex was a big mommas boy and did everything she told him to. We didn't start having relationship problems until someone had to put her nose in our business.

    Answer by MommysAngels810 at 4:30 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • Maybe I'm rebellious but if I wanted her ears pierced and my husband agreed it was fine, whether his mother wanted to intervene at all is not her decision. I wouldn't have taken them out when she was 6 months old just because his mother said she didn't like it. That is your baby and your choice. I know my mother in law doesn't agree with all the decisions we make for our son, but, she had that chance to make those choices with her own kids. She needs to take a back seat now and enjoy being a grandma, not sweating the small stuff.

    Answer by CassiRae3 at 4:43 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • She is your daughter, your decision. If you both agreed to the ear piercing then he should be a man and cut the darn apron strings and stand up to his meddleing monster ....

    Answer by bcauseimthemom at 5:13 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • I don't know. I'm of the mind that it should be your daughter's choice to pierce her ears if she wants to or not.

    Answer by meandrphoto at 4:15 PM on Dec. 8, 2010