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How can I get my Mother-in-law to step down from being in charge of our lives?

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Prayerpartner

Asked by Prayerpartner at 8:48 PM on Dec. 8, 2010 in Relationships

Level 20 (10,072 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • HOW does she do that? MAybe she is just trying to help?
    kerp1960

    Answer by kerp1960 at 8:49 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • tell her flat out STAY THE F OUT OF OUR Business! Okay maybe not that mean but sit her down and calmly explain you're adults and you'll like to run your own lives.
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 8:49 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • The only way to stop it is to SPEAK UP and usually they dont like it very mich... but if you dont your on a downward sprial that will only get worse....for the rest of HER life;) Good Luck, my ML drives me crazy we currently working through the "Im a grown up your not the boss of me" phase LOL Its really a joke and when I'm a ML I will be love them like theyre my own, as long as my kids love em, thats what counts;)
    madsmom314

    Answer by madsmom314 at 8:52 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • Aw. I feel for you. My EX MIL, (very grateful she is my EX MIL) ran our lives. I was very young and naive so I let her. I came home one day and she rearranged my kitchen cabinets so I couldn't find ANYTHING! She used to plan every holiday, birthday, event to suit her needs and could care less about us. She dictated to my ex husband, her son to 1) drive over in a snow storm to shovel her out....2) Put up her screen house each and every memorial day 3) pick up her parents that live 45 minutes away when we had two small babies to take care of. The list goes on. She even went with my ex husband to buy our daughter bedroom furniture without even consulting me! And bought curtains and hung them in my living room when I was at work! Can you imagine! Put your MIL in her place now. She could end up destroying your marriage and your life. Good luck.
    twinkletoes0408

    Answer by twinkletoes0408 at 8:54 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • Unfortunately, if you don't have your husbands backing, it will do no good and if you do have your husbands backing, then he's the one that needs to tell her to back off.
    ShouldHaveLeft

    Answer by ShouldHaveLeft at 9:04 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • dont involve her in your personal life and if she trys to nose in dont respond , let her know its none of her business , but you can do it in a nicer way or an assertive way.
    bekkaboo89

    Answer by bekkaboo89 at 9:18 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • Don't let her know any of your personal details - I keep my mother in law in the dark as much as possible. The more she knows, the more she will try to control. I think my MIL was cut from the same cloth as twinkletoe's EX. She has rearranged my kitchen (because silly me I had it ALL WRONG), come into our home and taken food from the fridge/cabinets so she "wouldn't have to drive all the way into town to the store", constantly talks down about me to my kids...the list goes on and on. Nip it in the bud now or you will be miserable.
    scout_mom

    Answer by scout_mom at 10:02 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • wow twinkletoes0408 are you sure we dont have the same ex MIL? lol mine did the same thing bad thing was my ex let her it got so bad we couldnt even go to the store and buy a loaf of bread without him calling his mom and asking if it was okay first and it was MY mother who gave us the money to get the bread. then when she started telling how to raise our daughter and the reasons why things were wrong with my daughters health were because of me and my family i went on the defense. she didnt like that very much. she didnt like it either when i pointed out the obvious to her that she was the reason me and my ex's marriage failed was because of her putting ideas in his head and him always listening to every word she said she still dont like me especially after she said something about my daughter being her child i let her know real quick me and her son are our daughter's parents not her and her husband
    sarahsmom0309

    Answer by sarahsmom0309 at 11:16 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • Do you live in the same house with her? If so, get out now. Don't wait. Otherwise, your husband needs to tell her that this baby is yours and you are the ones who are going to raise this child. It's up to him to do this, it's his mother.
    amessageofhope

    Answer by amessageofhope at 12:59 AM on Dec. 9, 2010

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