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How to explain to a three year old...

I'm 19 weeks pregnant and I finally decided to tell my little boy. I didn't tell him before in case something happened and I figured it would be easier just explaining to him later that there was going to be a baby rather then trying to explain there was going to be a baby then something happened. Well, I told him he was going to have a little brother and explained it was in my belly, he gets that part because he brought up that he used to be in my belly too. I asked what we should name him and he said "Rat Terrier" lol. Then he started telling me that the baby was going to take his toys. I'm just having a hard time trying to talk to him about it. I showed him ultrasound pictures and all he said was he wanted a baby kitty. It's funny and I understand how it's hard for him to understand, but I want him to be prepared so he isn't so shocked when it gets here. I'm also very worried about him feeling replaced. Any suggestions about how I should try to get him used to the idea? How did you tell your kids? Or do you think I should stop worrying about it so much and just see how things go when the baby gets here?

 
kayaiden8907

Asked by kayaiden8907 at 9:05 PM on Dec. 8, 2010 in Pregnancy

Level 17 (3,262 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • Just talk positively about it a lot. If you are in a playgroup that also has babies, make a special point of showing him how careful the mom is holding the baby, how the baby will get baby milk from the mommy, how babies cry to let you know they need something, etc. Take walks through the baby isle at the store and show him the diapers and wipes, clothes, etc. Let him pick things he thinks the baby will like. The more involved he is, the better it will be for the whole family. He needs to feel like this is his baby just as much as you feel its your baby too, and he will in time. Play dolls with him and show him what it is like to be a big brother to a baby.

    Also contrast what he can do with what a baby can do. He is a big boy, and can do a lot of things, and can eventually "teach" the baby a lot of things as well.
    It will be great, you will see. Don't stress, as kids are not thinking about these things as we do. :)
    squish

    Answer by squish at 1:00 AM on Dec. 9, 2010

  • You have a LOT of time. Whatever you say this week is very unlikely to have made such a huge impression on him that he'll remember it in 4 weeks much less another 4 months.

    Just keep talking about it, around him --get books from the library, talk to your partner and your friends...watch tv shows with babies...
    LindaClement

    Answer by LindaClement at 9:06 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • i really played up the fact that he was going to be a big brother. and all the stuff that he could teach the baby, and how i really need him to do all his special big brother jobs (get a diaper, throw it away, get a blanket, etc.). you definitely should get a cabbage patch kid or some other kind of doll as your 'practice baby'. that helped alot. we practiced good touch (gentle) vs. too rough. we practiced playing while mommy was nursing practice baby (just sit down with the boppy and the baby for about 1/2 hour and tell him the games he can do. at first he will bug you, but he will get the idea that this is time for quiet play after awhile). i also let him help me decorate the nursery. he helped me clean up the baby toys (that also lets them understand that the baby has their own toys and will not mess with their toys). we also took out books from the library about becoming a big brother/sister. that helped alot too! gl

    princessbeth79

    Answer by princessbeth79 at 9:16 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • with the toy thing just tell him tht the baby wont keep his toys just look and touch them that the baby wont keep them, and as for the rest just keep at it he will some what after a while but what i did with my neice since i kept her all the time separate i set some time thts just for her n i had her watch chiou its a cartoon and the little boy just got a new little sister and its him learning how to be a big brother and it shows them tht its not bad to have the baby around
    brezze

    Answer by brezze at 9:18 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

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