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How can a divorce effect a child

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:08 PM on Dec. 8, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • I think that a child would rather come from a broken home, then live in one. Everyone talks of staying together "for the children" but I think they would learn more from two happy parents that are not together, than two miserable ones that stayed together for their sake.

    Bubbie0809

    Answer by Bubbie0809 at 9:11 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • Depends on how old the child is and how bad the home situation is.
    ShouldHaveLeft

    Answer by ShouldHaveLeft at 9:12 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • There's a number of different studies, all with different results and opinions. Overall, it's argued that if the marrige is simply unhappy, but not violent or overtly hostile or even just cold, then the children do better if the parent's stick it out. However, children suffer considerably less psychological damage if the parents divorce then if they are hostile or agressive towards eachother. It also depends on the age of the children and financial stability of the mother. Children from 9-13 will have a harder time dealing with it then older or younger kids because they are already going through a number of changes and don't have the mental capacity to really deal with it well. One of the biggest factors, is income, typically the women gets the children, and has less earning potential, so the children may have to adjust to a smaller income/house/different lifestyle in addition to everything else. GL
    gypsymama532

    Answer by gypsymama532 at 9:16 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • it depends on how the parents handle it. If the parent work to get along for the best interest of the child, don't put the child in the middle and communicate about discipline, the child will be fine. If the parents argue, put the child in the middle and refuse to talk to on another, it will affect the child greatly.
    I'm a child of divorce. While my parents didn't communicate well, my mother never let us feel bad for the fact that she left him. She still held us to high expectations and had us understand that our father's issues were not our issues. I think I turned out pretty well.
    layh41407

    Answer by layh41407 at 9:22 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • i've read a divorce can damage a child really bad. Children that have to go from one parent to the other doesnt really know whether they are coming or going. I talked to a child that his parents shared joint custody, which I thought would be the Ideal thing and he said he hated it. Alot of young children like in pre-school have asked whos picking me up today mom or dad, who am I going home with? Even when children get older they have a hard time with it it doesnt get easier
    Momabear455

    Answer by Momabear455 at 10:19 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • Divorce really screwed up my brother. He was 15 at the time, and just went through a downward spiral. I blame my parents though, for they were both so self involved they ignored him during vital years. He dropped out of HS, started shop lifting, and then stealing from his friends and neighbors. He went to jail a few times too. He got involved with a BAD GF who just treated him horrible and made him steal for her as well. It was a few BAD years.

    He's 24 now, working FT, living with some roommates, and doing much better. He got his GED too.
    KairisMama

    Answer by KairisMama at 10:26 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

  • i was 13 when my parents divorced, and i still have abandonment issues. i was at the grocery store and dh had my kids and my sister's kids (5 boys) and he was just driving around while i was in the store...i nearly had a panic attack when i didn't see them when i walked out of the store! i know with all that i am that if he left me, it wouldn't be with my sister's kids too! but that was my first thought!
    i have a friend that became belemic, another that had an ocd, we see a neighbor that has to test every adult..that may or may not be a result of the divorce.
    it is different for all kids.
    happy2bmom25

    Answer by happy2bmom25 at 11:03 PM on Dec. 8, 2010

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