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Is it ok...that I'm not ok with not having more kids?

There's somedays that I'm okay with not having anymore kids but then there's days where I really want one or two more kids..I love my kids and I love being there mom even though things get hard and I do get stress at times...I dont know if I'm okay with not having more kids..Hubby says that we are done bc it will be to much with having four or five kids...we rent and we have four bedrooms and we take care of our kids on our own no helps us or the goverment..I'm a stay at homemom already..To me its not worth fighting with hubby over haing more kids...I ask this qustion just bc if we are really done then I'll like to get my tubes tied with in a few months..Yes I know it will be hard having more kids but my heart says theres more love there for more kids and I kind of feel like there is something missing like my family is not complet yet...

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:36 AM on Dec. 9, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (11)
  • There is nothing wrong with wanting anymore kids..I have one--and 1 is all I will have. ;)

    If you feel something is "missing"..perhaps its other things, and maybe "having another child" you feel that will "bond things"..up..but try getting some pets maybe instead..or a dog :) But don't feel bad..you're a great mother, and you already have wonderful children. ;)
    psychicRaelene3

    Answer by psychicRaelene3 at 9:39 AM on Dec. 9, 2010

  • Yes. The way you feel is the way you feel. Maybe he will change his mind later...
    KARRIEMARIE

    Answer by KARRIEMARIE at 9:39 AM on Dec. 9, 2010

  • YES IT IS OK TO FEEL THAT WAY. IM FIXED AND FEEL THAT SOME TIMES MYSELF...
    MAYBE YOU CAN BE A FOSTER MOM. THERE ARE SO MANY CHILDREN OUT THERE
    THAT NEED SOME LOVE TOO. GOOD LUCK.. HOPE THIS HELPED..
    HomeAlone45

    Answer by HomeAlone45 at 9:43 AM on Dec. 9, 2010

  • I seem to get a lot of crap from people because i DON'T want anymore kids. They think i'm messed up or something being happy with just one. People GASP when i tell them we're not having any more kids. But, my body is telling me to have kids, but my brain is saying NO MORE KIDS!

    It's just fine to feel the way you do. But, you need to compromise with your DH too. If he is really not wanting any more kids & you are, then this is should be a very important discussion to have.

    One thing that keeps me going is the hopes to be a grandma one day! I am very excited about having grandkids. Maybe you will be a grandma one day & once again you can roll around in the joys of small children running about. Just because you yourself might not have any more kids, does not mean that you will not have children around to enjoy anymore.
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 9:59 AM on Dec. 9, 2010

  • If he is really done having kids let him be teh one to get things snipped. One it will make him think about it a bit more and it is less invasive and easier and cheaper for him to get it done.
    mom2queenie2004

    Answer by mom2queenie2004 at 10:04 AM on Dec. 9, 2010

  • Well, you and your dh should come to an agreement. But, if he really is set on not having more kids, you may have to accept it. Also, you may want to re-evaluate your life and see if it really is more kids you are wanting, or is it something elese? I am not saying not to have more kids, but I think it should be a mutual agreement. I have three boys and that was plenty for us. My dh never said a word when I told him that after our last one, I was getting my tubes tied. Except for, well, if your sure. I was sure and I still am.
    A.Perry

    Answer by A.Perry at 10:09 AM on Dec. 9, 2010

  • I wouldn't do anything unless you are 100% sure. I got Essure done only after my husband AND I were 100% sure we were both done.
    purpleducky

    Answer by purpleducky at 10:17 AM on Dec. 9, 2010

  • Hub and I were done at 2 kids. Before I had my daughter, I had wanted 3 or 4. I'm prefectly content with the 2 I have. Its not that I didn't have enough love for more kids, of course I did and still do. If your hub is really done with having children, then maybe he should get fixed, or you could go and IUD route, those can last for up to 5-10 years and can be removed at anytime if you and hubby change your mind
    Zakysmommy

    Answer by Zakysmommy at 10:23 AM on Dec. 9, 2010

  • Have you thought about adoption? This is something you need to seriously discuss with him. Try to compromise. People think we are weird b/c we only want one. Good luck!
    Mom2Just1

    Answer by Mom2Just1 at 10:24 AM on Dec. 9, 2010

  • I am pregnant with number five. We also rent a four bedroom home. Yes money is tight sometimes, but we have learned to budget really well. If you feel that you want more kids wait before you do anything permanent to prevnet it from happening. Make sure yall both come to a 100 percent agreement so if you do decide to have more or decide to not have anymore then you have no regrets.
    elffyefli

    Answer by elffyefli at 10:28 AM on Dec. 9, 2010

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