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My daughter told my parents that my husband hit me...

which he didnt do ... I assume she got it from when we were all play wrestling the night before ( which is a common thing in our house) and i did end up getting a mark under my eye but that was from my older sons elbow - not my husband .... and the next day when my 4 year old daughter went to my moms to visit she told them that "daddy kept hitting mommy" ... and now my mom is so upset and thinks that I am lying about him hiding and even tried to come over to pack my stuff so me and the kids would go stay at her house..... I have tried to tell her over and over but she wont believe me.... I feel badly because now everyone thinks my husband is an abuser which honestly I would probably beat him before he would beat me....

what would you say or do ?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:01 AM on Dec. 10, 2010 in Parenting Debate

Answers (7)
  • Well first you have to explain to your dd that you were only playing. Id make sure the wrestling goes on when shes not there because it prob scared her. Just keep telling your mom to trust you and that you would tell her if somethig was going on. Thats really all you can do

    Answer by Steph319 at 10:03 AM on Dec. 10, 2010

  • Apparently your daughter is concerned or she wouldn't have said anything.. You need to sit down and talk to her and tell her Daddy wasn't hurting you, he was just playing. & you should probably retain from play fighting.

    Answer by SuperrMommyy at 10:05 AM on Dec. 10, 2010

  • Well she plays too... when she told my mom she wasnt upset she thought it was funny... and was telling my mom like how she would tella funny story or joke... I have told her that we were just playing and she said " I know " ... it is just my mom has blown it up

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 10:31 AM on Dec. 10, 2010

  • Sit down with your mom and ask her if there are any rational reasons for her to believe he is abusing you. Are there any past incidents? Does he have a temper? If the answers are all no, then does she logically have a reason to believe he just started abusing you? She is just trying to look out for you in the end.

    Answer by Shanna84 at 11:04 AM on Dec. 10, 2010

  • You know we had an issue somewhat like that a few weeks ago. DD out of the blue told MIL that she doesn't like going to her Aunt's (my sisters) because they hit her..MIL called FREAKING out and even after I explained that her cousin who is 5 hit her she didn't believe us and it was a HUGE issue my sister has 6 kids my dd is 4 her cousins are 12 (twins) 10,6,5,1....around that many kids she is going to get hit...they are kids it dd bit her cousin after he hit her but, MIL will NOT stop talking about it. It drives me crazy. What i finally did was to set my mil down and say "Look I understand that you are concerned but i have told you repeatedly that there is no problem If you can't accept that please stop talking about the issue. It is over. Leave it alone." She hasn't said anything since...


    Answer by momofone072506 at 12:49 PM on Dec. 12, 2010

  • If you daughter wasnt upset about it when she was telling and was laughing, then your mom needs to calm down. Have a talk with her.

    Answer by new_mom808 at 9:18 PM on Dec. 13, 2010

  • My four yr old did this once. My DH pulled up from work and I said daddy is home. and out of nowhere he says "oh great" I asked him why he said that and his response is "because he is mean and hits you"...nothing could be farther from the truth. I thought oh great, let him say that kind of crap in front of my family and they would freak out. I told my DH later that night, and it really hurt his feelings. We have NO idea where he came up with this. We questioned him, and he was evasive, like he didn't really know what we were talking about. Maybe when DH and I goof around he took it as a fight...who knows. If it is not true, then I would just reassure the child that you all love each other and would never purposely hurt one another and it should did for us.

    Answer by salexander at 11:01 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

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