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6 Bumps

Could this be a big part of me growing up at a young age..

Feeling like something was always bothering me mentally never knowing why I was always so sad or afraid, and the age of 18 started having severe anxiety attacks to the point of not leaving my home of 2 yrs.severly paralized with fear.I am in couseling again.I am 47 yrs old and at the age of 13 My Mom went grocery shopping with my other sibs,normaly I would have went to but remember waiting for a friend to come over.While I waited,it was only My Dad and I at home and he ask me if I would come over to where he was and to see if I thought his private looked small to me,He had it out.I just remmeber being sooo scared.Soon as my Mom got home I told her and then he called my name angrier than I ever heard and in front of my Mom called me a little lier.Later on in Life My oldest sister told me he started making her do sexual things and intercourse with her since the age of 7. Sorry long story.just never told this anywhere like cyber before.I don't remmeber anything else he might have done to me prior to that but there were other things he did but never made me have sex with him.I have had counseling after 18 because of the sudden severe anxiety attacks,I'm wondering if that happening could have alott to do with me becoming mentally sick,depression, etc...Does anyone have a similar story that u care to share or your input.and again sorry so long.I'm trying to make a long story short.Thankyou for sharing and what you did about it if you read this:)

Answer Question

Asked by karencrouch at 12:01 AM on Dec. 11, 2010 in Health

Level 10 (427 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • I have no idea what you're going through or what to say to help you, I just wanted to say that I am so sorry for what has happened to you

    Answer by an-apple-a-day at 12:11 AM on Dec. 11, 2010

  • Yes. Being indoors could be your way of protecting yourself from the outside world. Your parents are supposed to protect you, and they failed you. You are not alone. Although, we cant always trust the ones we love I promise you that not everyone wants to hurt you.

    Answer by bseastrand at 12:22 AM on Dec. 11, 2010

  • I have some anxiety. depression.. when i was young i was a daddy's girl. then one day i didnt want to be alone around him. IDK why.. I do remember a few times from 7yo-16yo (he passe when i was 16yo) he tried tongue kissing me a few times but a simple no & he would back off & say sorry. every time he was drunk. as i got older he got more into drinking. harder drugs. until it took his life when i was almost 16yo.. His death was both good/bad. I didnt have to fear him daily. but then i was left with my mom who I then felt i needed to care for. My social life changed. Going off to college was a goner.
    I just got help recently (im 27) its helped anxiety. but i cant get back the last 10yrs of my life. I missed so much & now im just lost, dont know how to live & move on.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:40 AM on Dec. 11, 2010

  • Oh, I am so sorry you have had to experience something like this. I definitely think that, that is what is causing your stress & anxiety; our bodies tend to block bad memories like that, but then appear in our memories years later. I am so sorry, I wish I could give you a huge hug & better advice. I would continue to see a counselor and I would also check out support groups, either online or in person which ever is more comfortable for you. It might help though, to talk to other's with a similar experience and usually talking about it can help you start to feel better & help you heal. I have also worked with a few non-profits & I remember they would always have the ladies keep a journal about their feelings. Whether sharing the journal or not it always seemed to help the women that I worked with because they said it gave them a better understanding. I wish you the best of luck & I'll keep you in my prays.

    Answer by Hope4Teal at 6:06 AM on Dec. 11, 2010

  • Yes, it most definitely has affected you. Like a prior poster stated, your parents are there to protect you and they both failed. It's no wonder you're dealing with issues now. Good luck in working through this, I'll keep you in my thoughts.

    Answer by mainemusicmaker at 6:50 AM on Dec. 11, 2010

  • Thankyou all so very much for your kind words and prayers.It feels so good to be able to write it down as well,I believe I will start a journal,Great idea!Godbless you all and Thanks again for taking the time to read it all:))hugs back to you.

    Comment by karencrouch (original poster) at 10:28 AM on Dec. 11, 2010

  • Yes that could be the cause of it

    Answer by LiLJeni at 8:08 PM on Dec. 11, 2010

  • I don't have any advice, but I am so sorry that happened to you.

    Answer by KTMOM at 9:49 AM on Dec. 12, 2010

  • i would say that it would def cause anxiety! i would seek further counseling and do what you are doing... share your story, get it out... it may really help you feel better if others know about it... even if they aren't people in your daily life ya know? i haven't been in your shoes but i know when something is really bothering me i can feel anxiety until i tell someone... and some days i just will post it here on CM to get it out and it helps... other days i call my SO or best friend and talk to them...

    Answer by asil at 11:33 AM on Dec. 12, 2010

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