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Felling lost and alone

life. I feel my life is my life but I am not able to live it to the fulliest. Like right now I am focusing so much on how to pat rent and school and other stuff I am not able to enjoy life. Like I am not traveling anywhere. I dont have the money to travel. I dont have money for anything. I'm making it work but I dont have enough fun in my life. I have been in negative friendships which have made me kinda hesitent to get to close to someone. I dont want people to hurt me for no reason again. same time I want friends I want to go out I want to look good and do all those thing fro before not just figure out how I am going to pat the rent. Please dont bash me for wanting to have fun I know the importence for paying bills just so much time effort and energy goes into it I am not enjoying much else. I'm only 27 and have been out twice since my kid was born. My family is no help, no one lives near me, and I have cut some people out because I didnt find them helpful/healthy. I want to be a responsible adult but I want to have a fun and active social life.


Asked by Jazmineamomma at 2:04 AM on Dec. 11, 2010 in Relationships

Level 18 (5,302 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • I took two parenting classes before, after having so much fun at the first one I signed up for another, and I enjoyed it. Gave me something to do and talk to people around my age. Learned stuff...... :)
    Have you heard of MOPS? (Mothers Of PreSchoolers) Look into it... I'm in MOPS and it is a time for you to interact with others moms, there's usually snacks, there is childcare, and many moms hook up for playdates and/or Mommy's Night Out.

    Answer by brandyj at 10:54 PM on Dec. 11, 2010

  • i understand u definitely need some time for yourself, being a mom is tough especially without help. don't feel guilty for wanting some time to yourself u are only human. i agree with gou18 look for moms in your area also check out churches u might find support there. churches are usually very welcoming and u might find a good support system there.

    Answer by maya123 at 3:17 AM on Dec. 11, 2010

  • I am in the same situation my family does not longer live in this country so even if they want they can't help me and believe me cuting those no good friends is your best bet also you can look here in the groups for moms near your area, set play dates or just go to take a coffe with an adult a mom like you. I am not a very social person so I kind of like to have this boring life :P but If you look into the groups you might find your next BFF good luck

    Answer by gou18 at 2:25 AM on Dec. 11, 2010

  • I dont find my self absorbd (sp). I use to be. I do not get when the mind sent that just because you have a kid your life has to end. Yes your life changes. Most definietly but I am still a human. if my child wants me to be at my best for him I need to have some me time. No mother would argue that sometimes you need that time to decompress. That is what i am talking about i wpould like to go out and do tings na because my help is nowhere to be found it makes me a little more stressed. Like right now I wish i had a ride to the grocery store. I dont have a relaitve, friends to ask. It is to cold to be on the bus carrying food and all that. yes it can be done but it's so friggin hard. i can not and will not give my life over to my son. I want the absolute best for him and do what it takes but I am still a person. I deserve to have something as well. Only mothers get flack. His dad aint around or paying. he gets no flack 4 it.

    Comment by Jazmineamomma (original poster) at 2:48 AM on Dec. 11, 2010

  • Maybe you just need a change in locale? Also, roadtrips are very inexpensive.

    Answer by SamKJones at 3:17 AM on Dec. 11, 2010

  • I so understand how you feel. I feel the same way but the difference with me is I am 42 and have a son but right now he is with his dad for a while, so I could go have fun but no friends to do anything with. Hugssss

    Answer by Lisa_Lynn at 7:33 AM on Dec. 11, 2010

  • sounds like you need to find mom support group "in real life" at a local church or the human resource one is bashing you for wanting some you time....but some times the you time is just getting up early and reading a book or something else you enjoy while the little one is sleeping......and for going out try to find a high schooler (a responsilbe one) to watch you son for an hour or so and go to a movie alone or sit in a cafe and drink for traveling look around your city at the tourist things to do there you might be suprised by what you find close to you.......

    Answer by cara124 at 9:14 AM on Dec. 11, 2010

  • yeah I need some more local interaction. I can be online all day and it not be the same as meeting a person for 10 mintues (face to face). I need the human interaction. I took two parenting classes before, after having so much fun at the first one I signed up for another, and I enjoyed it. Gave me something to do and talk to people around my age. Learned stuff...... :) lol the only time I have to myself right now is when i walking to the trash can to dump the trash.

    Comment by Jazmineamomma (original poster) at 2:04 PM on Dec. 11, 2010

  • ohhh. I will look into it..some reason I think Detroit has one...but will see thanks! :)

    Comment by Jazmineamomma (original poster) at 10:56 PM on Dec. 11, 2010

  • seems like to me that your baby's father needs to get involved.If he isn't then that is you rmain problem to begin with!!No child should have only one parent!!!it takes two (2) to make a baby so it will take (3) to raise a baby, Father, mother and GOD!!! not being mushy but true without GOD it is impossible to do the things you want and need for both you and the baby!!Wait till He or SHee wants jeans and tennis shoes that costs 100.00 each and that is just an estimaet of what sstuff costs today.I am 49 and raised tow boys from 12 years on!!!they were expensive and now we are getting ready to travel around the world!!!!you may jave to wai to do what we are gettin ready to do but you haven't put any effort into it yet!!Try raising 5 children NOT yours at all, missing 3 you placed for adoption and then get back to me about rasing one baby with no money to pay the rent.You have not becasue YOU ASK NOT!!! GO TO GOD FIRST!!!!!1

    Answer by wowmom7 at 4:18 PM on Dec. 12, 2010