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My 4yo must be potty trained!

Our son is almost 4 yo and is still not potty trained. His sister didn't train until she was 3 but once it clicked for her, she was golden. But not for him. I have tried pull-ups, but he didn't care and treated them just like diapers. I have tried putting him in underoos and have ended up with a lot of frustration and a washer full of laundry. He will "make a waterfall" in the potty when I ask him, but when he is in underoos, he will go in the potty then come to me 2 minutes later soaking wet. Also, he has never "made rocks" (his terms) in the potty even though he knows when he has to do that.

He is pretty comfortable with going in the big potty but will absolutely avoid the little training potty. He also knows the process for going (pull down pants, make a waterfall, pull up pants, flush, wash hands). He just seems not to have any sense of when he needs to go #1 prior to actually wetting his diaper.

He is the middle child with a 5yo sister and almost 2 yo brother and has always been more difficult. Also, there is another baby on the way and I do not want 3 kids in diapers at once.

I am planning on spending the day in the kitchen with him today, having him try to go potty every 10 minutes or so (He has to actually try because if I just ask if he needs to, he will say no but will wet himself a minute later). If anyone has any more advice for me, I would appreciate it.

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Asked by LadyKatya at 7:36 AM on Dec. 11, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 8 (234 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • Sounds like my daughter. The issue for her is that she does not feel it; has no sense in her that she connects to feeling like she needs to use the potty. We have tried everything and nothing has worked. For her, it's going to take time until she gets a little older and develops the awareness to do it. My daughter is 5. What else is going on with him? (you mention that he is more difficult to deal with) This may just be a symptom of something else.

    Answer by music4me at 7:49 AM on Dec. 11, 2010

  • I have wondered if it is something like you describe in your daughter. I cannot think of anything else that he has going on in his life that could have anything to do with this issue. He was born when we were homeless and so he was in a shelter, in the car with us, etc. until we finally got a home 1 week before his first birthday. And we have been stable ever since. We thought that this rough beginning might have slowed him down developmentally, but he has totally blossomed to where he is now talking, using his manners, helping with chores, and is doing the same homeschool work that his older sister is. He just cannot seem to know when he has to go.

    Comment by LadyKatya (original poster) at 7:55 AM on Dec. 11, 2010

  • Does he have friends around his age that wear big boy undies? Thats what motivated my son when he was almost 4. All his friends used the big boy potty and he wanted to also.

    Answer by aheuszel at 9:52 AM on Dec. 11, 2010

  • He probably has no concept of feeling the need to go. Usually at 4 years old...Dr will want to have him evaluated.


    Answer by Mom2Just1 at 4:35 PM on Dec. 11, 2010

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